Menopause Matters Forum
General Discussion => This 'n' That => Topic started by: groundhog on March 31, 2016, 11:58:42 AM
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Hello ladies,
I just wonder if other people's lives are like this or is it just me and the fact I can't cope anymore.
Got up this morning and cleaned teeth to find sink leaking, so feet got a wash the same time! Hassle no. 1 - plumber goes to answerphone as he's in holidays! So that's a work in progress.
Try to phone surgery for sick note for husband, he's never been on sick before in his life so this is stressful for him. First the surgery got the date wrong, then after several phone calls trying t get through they re did it onky to get the medical condition wrong! I've now tried to phne again and their phones are down. Hassle no.2
I live in a quiet cut de sac - as we speak a MASSIVE car transporter is stuck outside my house - obviously sat nav nightmare. He can't turn and there is a scene of bedlam and very angry driver. my tesco shop is about to arrive - or not, as it's looking now as he wont get anywhere near my house.
The home where my mother is just rang to say she had weed all over her trousers and hidden them in her wardrobe so all her clothes are smelly and contaminated, did I have any new ones for her. She thinks she is going on a cruise this afternoon and is distressed as she has no clothes. Feel sad at that thought.
My husband tells me this is normal life and I should be able to cope.
Is,this normal ladies?
Think I should go back to bed and stay there!
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I think it is normal the fact we're suppose to cope is debatable. At my worst of not coping I had therapy it got rid of the reasons why I didn't cope and at the same time allowed me to see what is acceptable to cope with as a human being and what not to put up with.
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Aww Groundhog :hug:
If my day starts badly then usually the rest of the day goes that way too.
Things always happen at once.
Depends on how my mental state is,as to whether I can cope or not, and if I'm not right mentally,it is 'or not' ;D
X
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Some days are just like this aren't they. You need to deal with what you can i.e. your husbands sick not stuff and just let go of the things you can't. It's not your fault the transporter is stuck (what sort of lorry is it by the way - I love lorries!) and I'm sure the shop will arrive eventually. As for your mum's clothes - have you got to go and pick them up (once you can get our of your road of course!) or do you have to start again and buy all new ones? I hope that the home can placate her a little so that she's not too distressed.
Taz x :hug:
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I do find situations like this get on top of me. I suffer with anxiety so I probably react to things differently than the normal person. If I have a 'busy' day with lots of things going on and things going wrong it can really drain me.
I also live in a small cul-de-sac and one of the neighbours is having an extension built that they started on Tues and it's noise all the time and getting blocked in by vans and lorries delivering skips etc. I hate it when I get blocked in as it's always as I need to take the kids to school or pick them up, so I panic we're going to be late.
After reading your other thread about the horrible time you have had of late, I would say you are finding it hard to cope just because of the mindset you are in at the moment. Other times, you probably wouldn't even bat an eyelid.
Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day x
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Have just been through probably the worst year of my life. Lots of family trauma, including the loss of both parents.
At times I nearly went under but suddenly, at the end of last year, I found an inner strength, which has got stronger.
The upshot is, dispite ongoing troubles, I am now calmer and happier than I have been for years. They do say that 'what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger', and I now believe that.
I no longer get stressed about the small stuff. Broken washing machines, spills and missing items, just don't bother me anymore. Even the more serious stuff I tend to think that it will be alright in the end. A good day is when nothing bad happens.
We none of us know what tomorrow will bring. It may be good, or it may be bad. Therefore just enjoy what you have and let fate take care of the rest. :)
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Stellajane,
All I would suggest is that the worst thing to say to a person with anxiety/depression is 'pull yourself together' or 'stop being stupid'. I don't tell many people about my anxiety as I have found people either laugh at me or say 'you're mental'.
A feeling of 'can't cope' is an overwhelming feeling of panic or anxiety which increases the heart rate, causes adrenaline to surge and a feeling of 'get me out of here quick' so to speak if you are panicking in a social situation, supermarket etc. I also suffer with health anxiety so if I'm having a rough day or things get on top of me, it just sets my anxiety off and I start to panic over any little symptom I'm having and go into a full blown panic and think the symptom I'm suffering from is life threatening. Therefore, I feel like 'I can't cope' as I can't get a control over my anxiety.
I have never been diagnosed with depression so can't comment on how sufferers feel but I did have an Auntie suffering from it and my mother (her sister) found her hard to deal with and couldn't understand any of it and thought she should just pull herself together and go out with her when she asked. She had no sympathy for her at all but as my Auntie explained to me later. It didn't matter what anyone suggested she just did not want to leave her house and her depression was like a dark cloud had come over her and she could not see any way out of it (she's over the depression and better now).
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Sorry to hear you're having a bad day Groundhog. I think everyone has days when they just want to go back to bed and sleep until tomorrow, however life isn't that kind! So it is normal, but it doesn't mean we can cope.
I agree with the comments of dealing with the things you can deal with and leaving the things you can't deal with to those who can. It's not your fault the transporter is stuck so leave that to people who can move it, and maybe the Tesco delivery person will just park at the end of the cul-de-sac and carry your stuff down. Can you find another plumber? Do you have anything for you Mum or do you need to go out and buy her something?
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I'm with halfpint and she explains it very well. People don't get it, not even those closest to you (especially those closest to you). the only ones who can even begin to get it are those who have been there and even they cannot say 'I know how you feel' because they don't. Everyone's experience is as different as they are.
All I know is that we do not have to justify ourselves to anyone. If we are feeling overwhelmed we need to take ourselves out of the current situation without anyone asking why. But we also need to be honest.
I have started being honest about how I feel (not why I feel like it) and those people who don't, or won't, get me then I really do not need to be around them just now. this is difficult when one of those people is my own son but I need to keep a polite distance as he thinks winding me up and 'jollying me along' will 'break me out of my self destructive cycle'. see what I mean.
My anxt and depression has been a life time coming and will take time and the right help to work through. It is not a headache I can take an aspirin for. Being made to feel guilty will only compound and prolong the problems.
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I stamp my feet like a 2-year old. Fortunately not much goes wrong all at once but when it does :'(
A few years ago I opened our hall door at 7.00 a.m. to find water pouring through - from a leaking radiator in the room above. I was jumping up and down saying 'what shall I do, what shall I do?" and Himself picked up the phone, cancelled going to work and then turned off the water.
I often spill sugar - either the whole bag or sprinkles; for some reason it sends me into a flurry of anger.
You've been through a lot. Why should you cope? Doesn't your husband fill in his own self cert. for sick leave?
The next big problem is my 'new' washing machine which dances across the utility room on a very long spin :-\. If altering the feet thingies to try and even it up then I really will throw a wobbly! It washes OK but the spin cycle is a bit OTT!
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I was dogsitting once and got up one morning to find the newspaper in the kitchen very wet. Took me a few minutes to realise that dog that size couldn't have done it, then worked out the washer was leaking! OH was away (as is normal when things break - I think he dreads leaving me!!) so had to get neighbour in to help me turn water off etc.
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Some days are just pants aren't they. One thing seems to lead to another through no fault of our own.
Could your hubby not have sorted out his own sick note though, that would have been one less thing for you to worry about.
As for coping, well that depends. Some days I'd be fine with whatever is thrown at me, others one small thing could send me over the edge. Life just sucks sometimes.
:hug:
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Nor me!
'not coping' for me is stamping of feet, tears of rage or worry, anxiety surges :-\ ………...
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How well I cope with various events depends very much how I am feeling physically and/or emotionally at the time.
I didn't cope well with the leak under the kitchen sink on my 60th birthday 2 years ago very well. Having to cancel plans didn't go down well! The recurrence of the leak on DH's birthday 2 months later created a melt down! In me anyway! Glad to say birthdays since then have been leak free! >:(
And how did I react when the builders van next door yet again blocked the shared drive when I was already late for an appointment? And DH is so ******* calm and reasonable and stopped me from making a scene! We found out later that the driver didn't have the skills and driving confidence to park it out the way!
Yes, we all have days like that when everything seems to conspire against us! And DH may not survive if he tells me that having a meltdown will not help! ;D
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Hello ladies.
Like many of you the way I respond to stress depends on how I am feeling at the time.
I know a very religious lady who told me that when she has a problem she just passes it to God and let's him worry about it!
Feeling overwhelmed is always horrible but as we have lived to tell the tale we clearly have coped, after a fashion, and we can be proud of ourselves for that!
Wishing you all well.
K.
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I am known for my over reaction to life events, it all stems from insecurity, anxiety and being brought up to believe I was responsible for bad things happening and therefore it is my responsibility to atone for them and keep everyone happy.
I am working on this but it ain't easy :(
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I have a blo…y calm husband >:( :bang: who won't allow me to cause a riot when things to wrong :D
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He'd get on with mine! But I don't want to be calm all the time!
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Yes sparkly, I seem to be far better at dealing with other people's meltdowns.
Thank you all for your comments, I'm obviously not alone. I think most of my problems are down to crushing depression and anxiety so everything is magnified.
The leak go put fixed, the shopping delivered, the massive car transporter thing reunited with its destination ( no idea what type it was Taz sorry ).
I feel I have lost my way, I dnt know what makes me happy any more so if I wake up to problems I just feel overwhelmed. Absolutely nothing compared to what some are going through, I'm aware of that. I've just lost my mojo completely - I've forgotten the last time I felt excited or happy and it's bad as life is too short and I know I'm just wasting time.
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Hey groundhog hope today is a better day for you?
I wonder if anybody has seen : black dog of depression on YouTube, it is only about 3mins long, but it helps explain depression xxx
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http://youtu.be/XiCrniLQGYc
I'm hoping this is the link xx
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Sorry ...when I was posting, there was other replies
Groundhog I'm struggling with depression and anxiety myself at moment and u can really empathise with you
Please please try not to put yourself down, you honestly can't help how you feel ......you would NEVER wish it on yourself and it doesn't happen over night, but you've been through a helluva lot so no wonder you've been knocked sideways
Sending you massive hugs xxx
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I know I'm just wasting time.
You're not just wasting time at all.
You're just saying how it is for you.
I would have gone ap***t with the day you had yesterday.
Trust me that's not good ::)
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Firstly - how is your DH today?
2ndly - I used to feel that drifting through my days was a waste but it was the way to healing. Dozing on the settee. Ignoring housework etc.; I did pick up with regular medication and feel tons better. But I can't always deal with stuff, this morning I took a look at the clutter on our lounge floor and the list of stuff we had to do this morning and thought 'oh no!' . Once I was up and at it though it didn't seem so bad, have pottered through the day with a break to meet friends in town. Now on here planning the next move.
Breaking up the day can help, for me it's doing the chores i.e. emptying the bins out of the way that clears a lot of head space!
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Groundhog...I felt quite tearful reading your reply. I felt like you do after my second child was born. I had a difficult birth and a long recovery. I felt like my husband didn't support me enough through any of it and it took me a long time to get over how he treated me during a year when I just felt like crap! I remember saying to a Community Midwife that I was worried I had Post Natal Depression and she said 'oh no, you won't get it, you've been through too much, it's people who have an easy time that get it'. Well I'm not sure she was correct about the type of person who gets it but even now years later when I look back at that time, even if it wasn't PND, I really feel like I was depressed. I felt how you feel now. Also, that's when my Health Anxiety kicked in and has never left me and just seems to have got worse.
I think you are still on your road to recovery and it's going to take time to feel like you again but I'm thinking of you and know where you're coming from and how hard it is xx
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CLKD I get like that with meal planning and cooking, just get overwhelmed with what to have and what to cook. Once the preparations are underway it often falls into place and my husband always clears up for me. It is never as bad as I fear when faced with all the ingredients.
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Some of the things that have been said on this thread are really sad and some quite shocking. I am lucky - I have no serious problems at all (at the moment fingers crossed!). There is nothing I can say to help except to give a :bighug: to all who are sad, damaged, upset or depressed.
Hurdity x
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Thanks again ladies. Il did try and reply individually but I can't seem to concentrate properly, please forgive me if I leave anyone out.
Mandz - thank you I will look at that link after I write this. I don't feel better today, I feel totally and utterly depressed .
It has been a long road and the holes remain as you know. Seeping and bleeding, always there and always a reminder. You may remember a few weeks ago I had a strange liver blood test result. That seems to have now triggered a massive health anxiety. One of the doctor said I could be the medication so I stopped the Prozac, big mistake and I think that is causing this massive nosedive. I have started taking them again. I had hepatitis tests and they were all negative. I am having a scan next Friday on my liver and gallbladder etc, I'm dreading it as I can't seem to cope with anything. I will also have general bloods redone,,again I'm nervous.
My whole life seems to be unraveling. The foundations are breaking up beneath my feet. My mother who despite her faults was the matriarch and she is now so unhappy in that home and my gut feeling is ladies she is not bad enough to be there. I know I've said it before but I genuinely believe that so when I see her like I did today I feel sick with guilt and utter sadness that she sits there with her coat on waiting for me. All this is contributing to this black dog which is crippling me at the moment. I have no GP ( my surgery is under sort of special measures - massive shortage of GPs in Wales ), I have no one I can really turn to, my husband well what can I say. Probably best I say nothing.
What a massive moany post and I know there are people reading this who will be thinking, get a grip woman, grow up, man up , wise up - I say it to myself every day.
Going back to the original post I suppose this is why I cope so badly with everything, any problem is magnified, everything is an irritation. What is happening to me. I don't know.
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Groundhog I really feel for you
Anyone that is saying any of that things like "get a grip etc" really need a wake up call, if it was as easy as that then I'm sure you, me and thousands of others would "just do that"......
I've said all that things to myself too, and in the evening when I'm calm I promise myself tomorrow will be different I'll get up and get cracking---- it doesn't happen!
In the weeks I've been off work I haven't been to see my mum and the guilt eats at me too
You have been through so much your body is probably telling you to slowwwwwww right down ........allow yourself to heal, you really need to, because the more you push forward the harder your getting slammed back.......slowly and gently
Hugs Mandz xxx
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Groundhog, can anybody go with you to the hospital, next Friday?
You seem to be going through a really rough time. But you've told us all, and that's really important. We're thinking of you. Keep us posted. :hug:
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You know that your Mum is in the best place! how could you help? You are not well. One has to be healthy in order to care for others! 'gut' feeling :-\ - time and distance has made it seem that your Mum isn't as 'bad' as you knew when she was admitted. However, she is safe where she is! You must have your own Life, particularly after the 12+ months you have been through.
Does she sit with her coat on all day, if so, what are the Staff doing to help? They are in charge now. Maybe she puts on her coat when she knows that you are visiting? Remember that people can manipulate family members >:( ……….
You may find that the Prozac won't work 2nd time around, I've never found going back onto an AD works. Why Prozac? It made me really really angry ::) so maybe the drug is not helping you!
My kidney function test was out of 'normal limits' but the 2nd one was absolutely fine. You seem to be hinging on the slightest problem that might 'allow' you to remain down. Your brain has become used to being down and really needs a boost. Hopefully the Prozac will ease symptoms and give the brain a lift. Also, your GP should be finding a Therpiast closer to where you live - being in Special Measures doesn't mean that we don't have access to a GP - the whole of the UK is short of GPs, it is not a problem confined to Wales. Sadly :sigh:
What coping strategies has the therapist given you? To help you need weekly appts.! which unless you have appts. close to your home you won't be able to access as many as you need to.
Try not to look any further than 2 hours ahead. Make lists in order to see what you *do* achieve each day. It saved me from many a dark place!
:bighug:
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Thank you ladies. I think stopping the Prozac was a bad move. That's the thing with AD you dnt think they are doing anything until you stop.
Duliciana I expect my husband will come with me but it's an early appointment and he is having sleep problems. He's been diagnosed today with sleep apnoea and will have to wear a mask to bed to aid his breathing, it explains his terrible snoring - we no longer sleep together which isn't helping. Anyway he will probably come with me but then there's the dreaded wait for results plus if course they have no history on me so I just know it's going to cause issues when they see the dressings etc . Minor problem I know.
CLKD - since the brain haemorrhage she is always waiting for something. It's so horrible and sad and it's been 4 years now - if this was vascular dementia I would have expected her to deteriorate now - don't take that the wrong way but she is fighting fit and thinks she is in her 40s. A new man has joined the home, in his 60s obviously some kind of brain injury. They were friends and she seemed happier - she told me today he's boring and old fashioned, no go in him! It's so hard, like a different person in my mothers body. she is anything but a typical dementia patient. The staff are good with her I think but I can't be sure what goes on, she looks well and is clean etc but she was telling me how they promised she could go home today if she had a shower and of course she had a shower then they said she couldn't go home. They treat her like a dementia patient and I don't think she has dementia, I think it's a brain injury - but you are right clkd, I'm not well and I don't think I would last a week or I'd drive us both of a cliff to put us both out of our misery. I wasn't that close to my mother but when she looks at me and begs me to go home, it breaks me. So much so I don't want to visit as I can't give her what she wants but can't reason with her as to why she can't go home. It's terriblle. Mandz I completely understand about the guilt, it's overwhelming but when I'm so so down, going to see her is torture, having to paint the smile on and say all the love lies and then leave her in a state as she is so disappointed not to be able to come with me.
Enough of me tonight, thanks for the hugs, thanks for your input sparkle.
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Your husband would do well to lose weight! Mine started having sleep apnoea symptoms, I would wake in the night because he had stopped breathing :o. After he lost 2 stone the symptoms went away ;). You however, are not the person to tell him ::) - mine is now 2 stone overweight again :bang: :bang: :bang:. we did the BMI 'test' on here the other night, mine is absolutely fine :P but he wasn't surprised at his result. "what are you going to do to alter this?" was my query and he gave me 'the look'. >:(
Who doesn't have your history :-\ ………. sorry, lost me on that one ::). Maybe write a few notes yourself to take along with you?
Has your Mum been assessed in recent months? i.e. by a Neuropsychologist: who will be familiar with head injury and associated problems etc.. Certain tests can be shown to her, i.e. reaction times etc., that way the Staff can be informed on the way to deal with the differences to dementia patients. Your Mum's GP should be able to recommend a suitable professional.
Accept that you are unable to give your Mum what she says she wants, quietly say 'it is as it is at the moment' and don't engage if she gets upset. Point out that her being upset makes you very sad ………. do you get the chance to speak to a Staff member who is there regularly?
You were happy when the Grandbaby arrived ;)
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Oh and I'm still so grateful for my little granddaughter, she is so precious and my daughter is adapting very well to motherhood. But even that opens up wounds for me. When my daughter was 2 I was seriously ill with bowel disease and at one point was given 3 months to live. It turned out I was pregnant and that was the reason my disease wasn't responding to anything, anyhow long story short i lost the baby and got better. But always the fear was there I was going to die and leave my daughter, now I have the feelings with my granddaughter and the twins - that's I'm going to leave them. How depressing I know.
Sorry I confused you re my history, the hospital I'm having the ultrasound n Friday isn't my regular hospital - it's a local hospital so there is very little on me. I'm sure they can figure it out though. Another overthinking symptom.
My OH def needs to lose weight - a work in progress. He is actually being quite thoughtful today, I think he can see how down I am - we are talking so that's good.
Have a nice day all xx
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So sorry you are so down at the moment. You sound as if you overthinking everything. You could have the tests and the results could be fine. My dad always used to tell me that I worried about things that may never happen. I know it's easy to say but all the worrying is contributing to you feeling worse.
I know it's difficult but I don't think you can do anything more to help your mother, I think you need to accept that she is in the best place, she is safe and that's all you can do. I have a friend who's in a similar situation with her dad, she cries every time she visits him (when she leaves). But she has now accepted that there is nothing she can do but visit. It has taken 9 months to get to this point.
Hope you feel better soon, maybe when the weather picks up it might lighten your mood. Xx
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Thanks littleminnie. I do worry about everything and it's now a massive problem for me. I just assume the worst all the time which isn't conducive to a happy life. Stopping the AD was daft but I'm back on them now so hopefully my mood will pick up.
It's all about acceptance, acceptance my op went wrong, acceptance this is the new normal for me and acceptance about my mother.
Thank you xx
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Groundhog, your post makes me do sad because as I've said before, I've been in a very similar situation to you many, many years ago and can totally understand your despair. You need to be seeing a counsellor ir a psychotherapist weekly, you can't do this on your own - you need some support now. I actually had another session of EMDR yesterday with a therapist I see who is actually a psychiatric nurse and I had to summon up a very traumatic incident relating to my illness at the time and he did the EMDR bit and honestly, I can't concentrate or think of this incident now if I try, it's totally weird. It's a therapy that deals with PSTD in particular, and I know that this incident was the start of my HA. Can you afford to go to someone privately? Even seeing a naturopath to get your body healing quicker or some acupuncture honestly made so much difference to my recovery. We are all here for you, but non-one knows how hard it is for you. It's bad enough dealing with all this anxiety crap, let alone something so physically draining as well. My heart goes out to you. Xxx
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Thank you justjules. Its strangely reassuring to read I not the only one going through this, I have read some of your posts again and I remember now, we sound like we have had similar problems . I am seeing a counsellor and she is treating me for PTSD - I start EMDR in 2 weeks. I don't know what to expect, sounds a bit gimmicky but I'm hoping it will work for me. Trouble is I only see her every 3-4 weeks although she is very supportive and is saying she will give me extra time as she is really keen to help me.
I've tried dietary things and I'm still on a high protein diet but yes I do need help but not sure where to turn now. I like this counsellor but as I've said before she's not local so not really possible to see her more often than I do. I am trying to eat healthily and walk every day, doing all the sensible things but this type of bowel complication can take years to heal, and may never heal. I think what worries me too is people cope with so much worse so why am I like this? I feel brighter tonight, the mornings are just dreadful, really really grim.
Hw are you now Justjules?
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Mornings are the worst time for me. All that day stretching ahead, when people might ask things of me that I don't want to do, when I might have a panic attack or feel queasy. Worrying takes up most of my brain space when I'm down. I can't divert my thought patterns to anything else :'(.
Could you ask your GP to refer you for counselling locally in between the sessions in Cardiff? Someone you can off-load to every week with a qualified professional who can guide you to improving your thoughts?
By evening I am a different person, once the responsibilities of the day have passed.
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Groundhog, I thought the EMDR would be a nit gimmicky but honestly, it's amazing. It got me on a plane last week without so much as a thought about the airport days before or running to the loo every two mins but I have been seeing this guy every few weeks for anxiety but mainly I wanted to get to the root of my HA, which I knew was related to the trauma from the illness and how I was treated. You will be amazed at how it works. There's been a lot of research into it lately and it's all good. It may take a few sessions as everybody is different. I think your GP needs to get you some weekly sessions as CKLD says, you may need to insist and say you feel you are on a slippery slope if they don't get you some help, or ring your local MIND. Like I've said before, a Naturopath is a good start and he did acupuncture as well but I did see someone else for a few years on and off too. I couldn't ever rely on just traditional medicine now as there are a lot of alternatives that greatly help alongside whatever medical stuff is going on. Apart from my HA, I am fine - I do have IBS type problems but they are controllable but that's the legacy from bowel surgery for you! When I had the leaking sinus, they did operate to 'clean it out' or whatever they did....it was 29 years ago ....and I was operated on for the second time and that was that. It did take me two years to recover though from two lots of surgery and peritonitis. Don't be saying that you feel bad as people are much worse off....yes, that's true but you are you, and your suffering is just as important and you need to show yourself some compassion and be kind to yourself. I honestly know you will recover but I would truly advise that you look into as many of the alternatives as you can, as they all work to get the body in a healing state. There are some rubbish practitioners out there but equally, there are some damn good ones so do your research. Yes, mornings are rubbish. It's when we are at our lowest physically when we are suffering so again, you're not on your own in that one either. I'm not a morning person at all, it takes me till at least 10:00am to start to feel anything resembling normal but that's just my physiology. I don't get much support off hubby either, which is hard. When I was ill, we hadn't long met, but he stuck around but sometimes, I wish he hadn't because it's been a hard marriage and doesnt help my anxiety.
Hope it helps...take care...look after number one and take a day at a time. My therapist told me yesterday to write down 3 things each day that I wanted to achieve, even simple things, and even that would help. Xxxxx
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Hello ladies, thanks for your replies.
I am eagerly awaiting the EMDR , I have googled it and still don't really get it but see how goes, lovely to hear it has worked for you. I know it's used widely in PTSD but I suppose what concerns me is my trauma is still ongoing in a way as the holes are still there so they are keeping the trauma going. Plus there are other things going on, mainly brought on by me , that aren't helping me either. My husband and I have spoken at length this weekend and he is trying to be more supportive but I still don't think he truly understands as it always comes back to how much worse it could be, well I understand that but it could be so much better too!
Today hasn't been too bad but my thoughts are akways preoccupied with 'it'. I can't say it ever leaves my mind, but we have been out today so time has passed and I'm not as anxious as yesterday although it's lurking, always lurking. I'm very much like yu there CLKD the worry does take over my brain and I'm no good for anything then it sort of lifts, I can almost feel it leaving me.
I think I could possibly get some counselling in between the Cardiff appointment as 3-4 weeks is a long time between appointments. I could try MIND to see what they say too.
Hope everyone has had a nice weekend, the promised sunny skies never arrived here in Wales sadly it's been very very wet 💦💦💦
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Oh love the rain drops ………. where'd you get those from?
When I had the phobia 'it' was on my mind 24/7, I would have nightmares so rarely got rest for years and years :'(.
Have you tried the 10 min. rule? i.e. you allow yourself to fully concentrate on the sinus area and how it is for 10 mins. in the morning and 10 in the evening. If your mind wanders there any other time you bring it back to the 'now'. It does take practice but I did this as I began to recover from mourning my pets - making sure that I thought about them at fixed times each day.
Other times I gave myself a psychological smack and said 'later' quietly, then got on with the task in hand.
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The raindrops CLKD are on my keyboard on the iPad, along with
🌪🌪☀️⛈🌧☃☔️💨 - lots of symbols and things.
Yes I am better when I'm preoccupied. Too much time on my hands . Let's see what next week brings. I'm actually going away for a few days - to West Midlands safari park - don't ask 😟😟🔫
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;D - but I will ask ………… ;). Let me know if it's worth going to, it's a fair hike from 'up here' so don't want to go if it ain't.
Try the 10 min. rule ;-).
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Will do &
Will do.
It's a fair trek from here too 😡
Il let you know 👍 Or 👎
🐯🦁🐒🐗🐘🐅🐆🕷🐻🐼
showing off now 😆😆
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It's very worth the trek Groundhog and CLKD :)
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:thankyou: worth B&B or camping even?
Life has thrown a rain shower at me, as I was busy setting sweet pea seeds >:(
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well we like it there and so do the grandchildren. Twycross Zoo is always a good day out too :)
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LOVE Twycross - it's where the Typhoo Tea Chimps live ;)
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Thank you babyjane - I'm not good leaving my comfort zone, you all know that but it's only a few days and hopefully it will be fine xx
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You'll have lots to report back ;)
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Groundhog, try not to have too high expectations. I hope you can enjoy it for what it is. Try to enjoy each moment as it comes and don't be afraid to say if you need to take a rest.
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Im just the same, i dont cope with life in general. Its a constant battle, nothing is ever straight forward even the things that should only take five minutes. 12 months ago I got to the point i couldnt cope with life anymore and went to the docs who mentioned medication and councelling. She gave me medication which I sat on over the weekend and decided that medication wasnt the answer. I needed to challenge the problem not take something to cope with it. I started councelling just before christmas which has lifted me a little. Its also nice having someone to talk to about just yourself for an hour, how you feel and what irritates you etc, I would recommend it to anyone who is feeling low and feels they cannot cope.
Clio