Menopause Matters Forum
General Discussion => This 'n' That => Topic started by: toffeecushion on February 20, 2016, 09:18:04 AM
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We are off to Florida next week for two weeks with Mickey Mouse and I am starting to panic about the flight. I have put it to the back of my mind, but can't escape it now. Anyone got any tips or advice that helps them. I am not so scared of terrorism or the plane falling out of the sky, although of course that does worry me (actually thinking of that is making me worry now), but my main worry is that I panic on the flight or that I will have an SVT attack. I am taking things to keep me occupied and I will have the on flight entertainment and I have informed the airline that I am a nervous flyer, but I am absolutely dreading it now.
Any advice or words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated.
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Valium!
I can't be shut in so sitting in a Smartie tube with 100s of other smelly, farty, nervous people is a complete No No :'(.
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For me it's not the fear of flying, it's more to do with feeling uncomfortable being couped up for an 8 hour flight. That causes me anxiety. I now request aisle seats so I can move about freely without disturbing others. Some use Bach's rescue remedy. Others get something from GP to calm them. Good you've told the airline though. When I had CBT I was told to think of somewhere where I feel calm. I take my iPod too nowadays. Put on calming music which helps.
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I never feel calm anywhere if a situation is likely to cause anxiety, even at home :sigh:
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Your reasons are the same as mine toffee cushion. I take rescue remedy in the chewing gum form. I find I am more nervous during the build up to the flight than the actual event. I always have an alcoholic drink on the flight, this helps. I take loads to do on the flight. I've even kept a journal of the flight before now.
I won't let it stop me flying though.
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I couldn't bear the idea of not being able to get off if I wanted to! It's all about control of course. I even hate having to wait in a queue at roadworks or traffic lights at the minute - panic disorder turning into agoraphobia apparently. Interesting subject which also includes not being able to stay in other people's homes or to have them stay over at yours, always choosing the aisle seat in cinemas, avoiding public transport etc.
Sorry I digress! I'm sure you will be fine TC. Have fun with Mickey Mouse. :)
Taz x
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I've been like that for years :'(. Which is why I didn't know that my friend was so ill ………
By avoiding - despite what the Psychologists told me over the years - means I remain well.
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I'm the other way CLKD, once I've done it, I'm so pleased with myself that it gives me confidence to do it again. I've flown every year for 40 years.
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Try and get a hypnotherapy session or two before you go?
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I couldn't bear the idea of not being able to get off if I wanted to! It's all about control of course. I even hate having to wait in a queue at roadworks or traffic lights at the minute - panic disorder turning into agoraphobia apparently. Interesting subject which also includes not being able to stay in other people's homes or to have them stay over at yours, always choosing the aisle seat in cinemas, avoiding public transport etc.
Sorry I digress! I'm sure you will be fine TC. Have fun with Mickey Mouse. :)
Taz x
That is me to a T Taz. Mine started about 4 years ago when I suffered a very terrifying incident and the guy involved was sent to prison. I was diagnosed with PTSD and had counselling for months.
It left me with a fear of being anywhere I couldn't escape. It was so bad at first that on my dog walks I could only go onto fields Where I knew all the holes in the hedge so I could get out quickly. Had to sit at front of buses and planes so I could get off quickly. Have to sit in aisle seats on planes and at cinema. I have got very stressed in friends cars when we stop and the doors won't open straightaway.
Toilet doors I don't lock. I have made myself a special card which I hang outside the toilet door saying "Engaged." I don't care if people think it's funny, at least I know I can get out quickly.
We have booked a holiday to Tenerife at Easter and I have booked us aisle seats very near front going and very near back coming home. DD and I went on holiday 2 yrs ago and she had window seat and I had middle. a man got on and sat in the aisle seat and spent most of the 4 HR flight sitting with his arm resting on the seat in front. To me that was like a permanent barrier and I thought I was going to vomit all over him. I had to keep going to the loo to ease the situation and he kept huffing and puffing as he had to get up every time. I asked if he would like to swap seats with me and he said he HAD to sit in an aisle seat so I said "well you'll just have to keep excusing me then." ;D
and the traffic queues ... Just the same. I was in a queue in a car park and it was very narrow and I'm thinking I can't get out if I need to and I was getting in a right old state.
My tips for Toffeecushion. Take water to sip. I also have a relaxation tape I listen to and that really helps and book your seats in advance.
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I couldn't bear the idea of not being able to get off if I wanted to! It's all about control of course. I even hate having to wait in a queue at roadworks or traffic lights at the minute - panic disorder turning into agoraphobia apparently. Interesting subject which also includes not being able to stay in other people's homes or to have them stay over at yours, always choosing the aisle seat in cinemas, avoiding public transport etc.
Sorry I digress! I'm sure you will be fine TC. Have fun with Mickey Mouse. :)
Taz x
That is me to a T Taz. Mine started about 4 years ago when I suffered a very terrifying incident and the guy involved was sent to prison. I was diagnosed with PTSD and had counselling for months.
It left me with a fear of being anywhere I couldn't escape. It was so bad at first that on my dog walks I could only go onto fields Where I knew all the holes in the hedge so I could get out quickly. Had to sit at front of buses and planes so I could get off quickly. Have to sit in aisle seats on planes and at cinema. I have got very stressed in friends cars when we stop and the doors won't open straightaway.
My tips for Toffeecushion. Take water to sip. I also have a relaxation tape I listen to and that really helps and book your seats in advance.
That's me too, and sorry to go off topic, but it's just so helpful to know I'm not the only person. So sorry to hear about that incident PF and sorry you suffer too Taz. The only person I've ever told is my OH, and I don't think he fully understands because it's so hard if you don't experience the feelings first hand.
TC, I've flown many times despite the above (and Thanks to being a totally stubborn whotsit!) and I find the following helps:
- tell the flight attendants you're a nervous passenger
- take music and your own over the ear headphones so you can use them for the entire journey to block out noise
- take a variety of distractions (puzzle books, reading stuff, etc.)
- take stuff to plan your visit so you have a job to do
- with some airlines you can check out the inflight entertainment before you travel so you can see if there's anything you want to watch (something to look forward to)
- if there are empty rows ask if you can move (if you have unwanted companions in your row)
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Thanks for all your replies.
I have spent the morning sorting out my music and my hubby has put a load of things to watch on my tablet. I have an adult colouring book too and we are flying with Virgin so I know there are some good films that I can watch. I have a relaxation cd from Virgin's Fear of Flying course on my Walkman along with a Clarie Weekes audio recording. So, fingers crossed I will be fine, it doesn't stop the anticipatory anxiety though.
We are on our own in a row of 2 and right next to the toilet. Hopefully it won't smell too bad, just thought it would be better to be close to the toilet, just in case I feel the need to be on my own for a while.
Thanks again :)
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also there's no harm in smiling nicely at the check-in staff and asking if there's the chance of an upgrade ;)
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Thanks for all your replies.
I have spent the morning sorting out my music and my hubby has put a load of things to watch on my tablet. I have an adult colouring book too and we are flying with Virgin so I know there are some good films that I can watch. I have a relaxation cd from Virgin's Fear of Flying course on my Walkman along with a Clarie Weekes audio recording. So, fingers crossed I will be fine, it doesn't stop the anticipatory anxiety though.
We are on our own in a row of 2 and right next to the toilet. Hopefully it won't smell too bad, just thought it would be better to be close to the toilet, just in case I feel the need to be on my own for a while.
Thanks again :)
I was really interested TC that you have no fear of the plane crashing or terrorists. I'm exactly the same. No fear of either at all and my friends find that most odd. But being stuck halfway up the plane behind queues of people waiting to get off just fills me with dread.
I'm sure you'll be fine, you sound as though you have every angle covered now. Xx
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also there's no harm in smiling nicely at the check-in staff and asking if there's the chance of an upgrade ;)
We were upgraded a couple of years ago to first class and I cried my eyes out. Not through excitement though, I was terrified as they had changed where I was sitting and I had planned everything and they changed it lol. Must have seemed really strange to the check in staff.
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Thanks for all your replies.
I have spent the morning sorting out my music and my hubby has put a load of things to watch on my tablet. I have an adult colouring book too and we are flying with Virgin so I know there are some good films that I can watch. I have a relaxation cd from Virgin's Fear of Flying course on my Walkman along with a Clarie Weekes audio recording. So, fingers crossed I will be fine, it doesn't stop the anticipatory anxiety though.
We are on our own in a row of 2 and right next to the toilet. Hopefully it won't smell too bad, just thought it would be better to be close to the toilet, just in case I feel the need to be on my own for a while.
Thanks again :)
I was really interested TC that you have no fear of the plane crashing or terrorists. I'm exactly the same. No fear of either at all and my friends find that most odd. But being stuck halfway up the plane behind queues of people waiting to get off just fills me with dread.
I'm sure you'll be fine, you sound as though you have every angle covered now. Xx
I suppose if I think about it it does worry me slightly, I guess everyone is a little concerned, but the thought of panicking on the plane or needing the toilet and finding a long queue bothers me a whole lot more at the moment. As soon as I get a twinge I am up to the toilet just in case the seat belt sign goes on. People must think I have a weak bladder lol.
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TC we sat near toilets to/ from Cuba one year. No problems with any smells. You sound well organised with plenty to keep you occupied. Virgin airlines are very good. Now time to enjoy yourself & say Hi to Mickey for me. ;D
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I agree with CG, we always pay to sit at the front and I've known the toilets smell.
I take the adult colouring book too. Plus a crossword book, my iPad, magazines, newspaper. My hand luggage weighs a ton.
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Toffeecushion - Fellow Florida fan here!! :D Firstly - I am very jealous you are visiting Mickey so soon! :D I have to wait until October to see him this year! ;) ;D
I have no advice to give as a fellow sufferer, as I LOVE flying! :) But if I WAS nervous I'd go with the totally relaxing myself route. I'd prepare some happy music (get your Disney CD onto your phone! add some other calming songs other favourite tracks etc) to listen to throughout take-off and the flight. Practice deep breathing, think of a scene or a scenario as your 'happy place' which you can go to in your head, and when stressed go to that happy place. Mine is actually laying on a sunlounger in the warm late afternoon sun at Aquatica with the sound of water in the distance and their Australian soundtrack playing. Works a treat! ;) Close your eyes and concentrate on your own Happy Place, or imagine yourself walking down Main Street with that castle in the distance, a wonderful day ahead of you in the sunshine.
Haven't read it all, but there sure is lots of brilliant advice from others on this thread!
Oh, and have a fabulous time!! Tell Mickey I'll be with him in Oct! ;D
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I've looked at the seating plans of various airlines and there are too few loos for the amount of people carried >:( …….. same as on trains :bang:
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Toffeecushion - Fellow Florida fan here!! :D Firstly - I am very jealous you are visiting Mickey so soon! :D I have to wait until October to see him this year! ;) ;D
I have no advice to give as a fellow sufferer, as I LOVE flying! :) But if I WAS nervous I'd go with the totally relaxing myself route. I'd prepare some happy music (get your Disney CD onto your phone! add some other calming songs other favourite tracks etc) to listen to throughout take-off and the flight. Practice deep breathing, think of a scene or a scenario as your 'happy place' which you can go to in your head, and when stressed go to that happy place. Mine is actually laying on a sunlounger in the warm late afternoon sun at Aquatica with the sound of water in the distance and their Australian soundtrack playing. Works a treat! ;) Close your eyes and concentrate on your own Happy Place, or imagine yourself walking down Main Street with that castle in the distance, a wonderful day ahead of you in the sunshine.
Haven't read it all, but there sure is lots of brilliant advice from others on this thread!
Oh, and have a fabulous time!! Tell Mickey I'll be with him in Oct! ;D
Its nice to hear from someone who understands the 'Disney thing'. I do think of walking down Main Street whenever I am in a stressful situation like the dentist, it does help. We haven't been since Christmas 2013, I just know I will cry when I see the castle. Sounds crazy to other people, but you have to had experienced Disneyworld to understand lol. We've been doing the Disney Cruises so we could avoid the long haul flights, but couldn't resist the pull any longer. I'll give Mickey a hug for you :)
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I've looked at the seating plans of various airlines and there are too few loos for the amount of people carried >:( …….. same as on trains :bang:
We are sitting right in front of the loos and I will make sure I go as soon as I feel the urge, just in case the seatbelt sign goes on ;D
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CKLD - the amount of toilets on planes and trains is no different that the proportion of toilets:people in offices. Not everybody wants to go at the same time. :)
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CKLD - the amount of toilets on planes and trains is no different that the proportion of toilets:people in offices. Not everybody wants to go at the same time. :)
They always seem to go when I want to ;D
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My biggest fear when travelling is having a bowel accident. Never mind all the other things I could be frightened of...... Haven't had one yet. Later on this year, I have the chance to fly on my own to see my son and family, as I have accumulated enough virgin points. Probably good for me, but....... :-\
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We are sitting right in front of the loos and I will make sure I go as soon as I feel the urge, just in case the seatbelt sign goes on ;D
I got caught in the loo during turbulence once. Had steward knocking on door asking me if I was OK & if I could return to my seat asap. ;D
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Paul McKenna has a great 'Fear of flying ' technique .....I had it on my MP3 thingy last time we flew, I was amazed how much it helped me.....Its the turbulence that frightens me, but my Pilot son assures me that it's nothing to worry about, in fact Pilots love it, stops them getting bored ::)
I remember on one flight, I had wandered to the back of the plane to stretch my legs, and we suddenly hit turbulence. They made me sit in a spare seat at the back until it stopped, I was worried that my husband would be getting worried as I had been gone so long. When I was allowed to move, I hurried back to my seat, to find him fast asleep :beat: :beat:
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I got caught in the loo during turbulence once. Had steward knocking on door asking me if I was OK & if I could return to my seat asap. ;D
I got caught in the loo during turbulence as well, I don't know about you, but I can't sit down on the toilet seat (especially during a long flight lol) and squatting and turbulence really don't mix ;D. Have you tried pulling up your knickers one handed while holding on to the sink while the plane is bouncing ;D
Well just dropped our bags off at the airport, so all set for tomorrow :)
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Perhaps they should provide seat belts in the loo if you cannot complete the job quickly and turbelance starts! :o
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Having music to listen to is a definite must - as I realised when Dad and I travelled to Malaysia two years ago and I left my music at Edinburgh airport security, in the fluster of getting Dad around safely. Oh, that was a long journey - I just wanted to weep :'( !
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I can't sleep on the plane, but have found listening to a hypnotherapy recording ending with telling me I was full of energy and alert, near the end of the flight, got me through immigration and on to my destination.