Menopause Matters Forum
General Discussion => This 'n' That => Topic started by: Cassie on November 25, 2015, 05:52:54 PM
-
Is this only me....all my friends seem to cope admirably, flying across the ocean from continent to continent, the thought of it, turns me into a shuddering mess, I know its silly as I am hampering my chances of seeing the world, take a sleeping tablet they say but I know that wont be the same and worry about having a panic attack, so silly I know..... :(
-
I can sympathise. I used to be able to fly no problems, but now anything more than a short flight has me quaking. Last yesr, after going to the Caribbean for a holiday, I said no more long haul flights. I hadn't really wanted to do that flight, but hubby wanted to go to St Lucia for his 60th Birthday. On way home airline wouldn't give me an aisle seat, so I was like a caged animal. Hubby was given a seat 6 rows in front, so you can imagine my anxiety. He argued point with staff before we boarded, but they didn't budge. I was so anxious I was popping anti sickness pills like smarties. Bumpy flight didn't help either.
So not silly at all Cassie.
-
I don't have a fear of flying but I do have a fear of being trapped in a plane with people I don't know and not being able to escape, and my emetophobia goes into overdrive. I dare not take any sedatives in case they make me ill but do take the anti-sickness pills. I fly as little as possible, but have done several transatlantic flights in business class thanks to DH's frequent flyer miles, and it does help.
-
I can think of nothing else (well 1 thing worse) than being stuck in a Smartie tube with 100s of other smelly, farty, fat/thin/snoring people ;D for hours at a time. I used to say that if John Travolta would fly me in his Lear Jet I would go but I'm not so sure that I would. I wasn't given wings :D and it would still be shut in a small area, completely trapped.
I almost went to Canada with my Granny many years ago but family talked us out of it - she also suffered agoraphobia ::)
The only place I really want to go is the Italian Lakes. However, I am sure if I found that flying is OK we wouldn't have any money at all ;D and of course, it would be my Luck that, having decided that I'm OK with the early starts, the long queues at check-in, the lack of toilets …….. the plane would be hi-jacked, or get a problem with an engine, or the food would run out or toilets would get blocked :-X :P
-
I've never liked flying and only started flying more or less annually about 10 years ago. I have never been on a long haul flight and the thought terrifies me. As it is I grip the seat and close my eyes tight shut on take-off and landing and the slightest buit of turbulence has me cowering and clutching my husband in terror. We never flew when the children were growing up as we couldn't afford this type of holiday with them. The best times are the evening flights as I have a glass of wine and then feel suitably chilled and less scared! I sympathise!
CLKD you can go overland to Italy?
Hurdity x
-
I'm don't like flying much either. I still do it however. One long haul and one short haul this year.
Take off and landing doesn't bother me, I just don't like being cooped up and not being able to move about much. We always book our seats so I know where I'm sitting.
-
Could - in the camper: anxiety however stops me in my tracks :'(
I would love to be able to teleport ;)
-
As my son lives in the USA, I have no choice but to fly. We travelled round the world with several long haul flights 10 years ago. I don't love flying, but I'm ok if I don't look out the window. I have a phobia about height and space, so you wouldn't get me in a helicopter etc. Films, books, sudoko etc help. I can't sleep, but find listening to hypnotherapy tapes near the end of the flight helps that horrid fuggy feeling going through immigration, as they end the tape telling you you feel energetic and alert.
-
I also have a fear of flying after a horrible flight back from the Carribean 25 years ago and took me 10 years before I flew again. I did manage a holiday to Florida but the stress just got too much even after a course of hypnotherapy and diazepam from the doctor. My OH has to occasionally fly with his job, this sets my anxiety off the scale now.
-
Had horrid flight this year too & it was short haul. Hubby came away with inappropriate comments so I told him to put a sock in it as he wasn't helping! :-\ However, I keep telling myself to stop being silly. A while back I said I wanted to go to New York for my 60th which is next year. I've spent the last few weeks saying let's just have a nice family get together. Even told daughter this, for hubby to immediately say he may already have a treat planned. Hopefully doesn't involve long haul flights!
-
We don't do surprises. I've been known to say 'no' and walk away :-\
-
I'd never do that, especially if someone has gone to so much bother. At 50 I thought I was going to London & we went to Paris!
-
My husband suffers badly with flying. He swears by a gin and tonic, or a few, before take off and best not to talk to him as it is the one and only time he will use swear words!! :-X
-
If someone goes to any 'bother' then it's for themselves, not for me ……… surprises made me ill as a child so we decided early in our courting days that it will be discussion only ;)
-
Oh I agree with your husband Babyjane. A gin & tonic definitely helps :)
-
I'd never do that, especially if someone has gone to so much bother. At 50 I thought I was going to London & we went to Paris!
I think, when you're a very anxious person, the anxiety overrides any form of logic. The fear of change, combined with loss of control, can dominate all other emotions. That's why, on the surface, my reaction to certain surprises may have seemed ungrateful, but the truth was more complex. I know that those who genuinely care for me know me well enough not to put me in a 'surprise' situation as they understand how I'd react and that (with a few exceptions) know it won't bring me pleasure.
I don't know if that makes any sense? It's hard to explain! ??? I never used to be like this. It's happened at same time as peri. My partner has learnt that the best way forward with me is 'slow surprises' where I'm given plenty of warning and an element of choice!
-
I can't handle surprises either, I need to know exactly what's planned, well in advance. And am petrified of flying too...even thinking about it makes me feel ill! Has anyone done the 'Flying without Fear' course offered by Virgin? I've thought about it many times but because it involves a short flight at the end haven't been brave enough to try!
-
Briony - exactly, well put!
I don't drink :-\ and have never smoked so can't ease worries about being shut in with others …… can't go on trains, into coaches, busy shopping centres (though that isn't as difficult as years ago) - haven't been to The Chelsea Flower Show or Kew Gardens because getting there is a problem :-\
Would anyone else be OK with John Travolta in a small private plane? ;)
-
Couldn't you go in your camper and stay nearby CKLD? The journey wouldn't be too long.
-
The very first time I went flying it was in a four seater Cessna.
This was from a small airport near Birmingham which had a grass strip for a runway.
Went with he who became the current Mr Limpy, the pilot was his chum who'd just got his pilots licence
Trust me, after that big commercial planes are a doddle. ::)
-
When my son got his Private pilots licence he took me on a flight , and knowing I was scared of flying he said 'Don't worry Mum I can land this plane in a field if the engine fails ' :-\.....so rarther than enjoying the experience , all I did was look for fields ;D.
We were discussing why I was so afraid of flying, and I said it's more the fear of crashing and the fact that most airline pilots don't tell us what is going on during the flight for example when there is bad turbulence or when the plane has to circle for a long time before landing :o
Well he is now an airline captain and talks to the passengers a lot if needs be......telling them exactly what is going on and reassuring nervous passengers. He said he sometimes mentions me and my fear of flying.....
Do you ladies think this would be helpful to you.......just that bit of reassurance ?
-
Ellie - I think that bit of reassurance would be really helpful especially during turbulence or waiting to land.
-
It's the being shut in that I can't handle :(
-
Which airline ellie. That's the kind of pilot I want on my flights!
My hubby gained his private pilot's licence many years ago. However, it became rather expensive to keep up the flying. He did take the kid's up once. They were excited, I was sick with fear!!! When I protested, I got "Don't you trust me to look after our kids?" Well yes, but.......... I never went up with him.
-
Bizarrely, my partner is a commercial pilot too. Isn't that odd that so many of us don't enjoy flying yet have close family who do it for a living? He always communicates as much as he is permitted in flight and encourages others to do so too (as he is a trainer). However, this doesn't help my own fear of being enclosed in a small box with a load of strangers (especially as the nature of our tickets means we often cant sit together). I'm not actually sure what I think is going to happen to me/the person next door to me - but the whole time I clock-watch and hold my breath! ??? I'm usually pretty relaxed about him being in the air on a day to day basis (as long as I am not on the plane!) but since the Paris attacks, I've become more anxious again. Has anyone else felt that way?
-
Yep. If DH is late getting anywhere or arriving home :-\ ….. I've always been the same.
-
I love flying and looking down on big, fluffy white clouds, teeny-tiny little boats on the sea, or countries that you fly over. I'm actually more of a coward on boats, as I have inherited my gran's fear of water and I don't like swimming (although I can). Mind you, I must be honest and say that I was glad we'd flown to France and got back before all that happened..................... :-\
-
Cubagirl he works for Thomas Cook and loves his job... But I prefer a nice cruise, at least I can swim :)
-
Don't think I could do a cruise, hubby certainly won't. Too much water. ;D
-
Ellie if your could give us your sons schedule we could book our holidays accordingly. :)
-
He could run his own airline ;D
DH thought he would be bored on a cruise ::)
-
;D I will put it to him ;)....perhaps we could have a whip round ? Not too sure if he could afford a whole fleet !
Any suggestions for a name for this new airline?
As for being bored on a cruise ! You can be as active, or relaxed as you like and I love waking up in a different place almost every day......It took a LOT of persuading to get my DH to go on our first cruise and then he's was hooked...
My favourite cruise is sailing across to the Caribean and flying home (flying being the only bit I don't like).....Ill health stops me going now, or we would be off.
-
DH wanted to go to see the Northern Lights many years ago so I spent months finding a route that didn't include flying only for him to decide he would be bored ::) ……….
We have a charabanc; a choir; hairdressers ……. now a personal plane :great: 'the purple plane' [when I am old ….. ] :D
-
The MM Purple Pride Airline ? With its own PP (personal pilot)
Now where should our PP fly us too?
-
Got a lot of places on my bucket list Ellie. How about Barbados to start us off.
-
Italian Lakes
-
Yes, love Italy.
-
Barbadas for me too, so I can swim with the Turtles again :-*
-
Ok, when shall we go?
-
C.mas Eve ;) until mid-March?
-
Oh perfect, come on ladies we need to fill this plane up!! ✈️ 🎈
-
"Leaving on a jet plane, don't know when I'll be back again....,"
Anywhere warm & sunny!
-
Is this only me....all my friends seem to cope admirably, flying across the ocean from continent to continent, the thought of it, turns me into a shuddering mess, I know its silly as I am hampering my chances of seeing the world, take a sleeping tablet they say but I know that wont be the same and worry about having a panic attack, so silly I know..... :(
OK I had to fly OZZ to UK and back 15 times 10 alone since 1990 and not only am I terrified of flying
BUT my husbands parents were KILLED in a Plane crash on a Pakg holiday to Spain when he was 13
This year alone Ive flown to UK to see Dad bury him return to Ozz 9 weeks later return to UK then fly all over Euroipe Paris rome Venice Bahrain etc etc and I scared witless I feel sick I feel Im doomed
Every bump Ive been known to scream ALOUD I was moved 3 times to Buisness class cos I was amess
I flew alone again last week to New Zealand and back again 5 days later
I WONT allow the fear to overcome me Im sick I voimmit I cant eat for days before hand IT WONT WIN
I take NOTHING except a Diazapam pill I dont drink on the plane I hardly eat at all I sit for the entire time white knuckles UT IT WONT win I cant allow it to win I love the world I love home (UK)
I lov e Paris Venice Rome Bali USA and its the only way to go is to fly so I do it even thought I kow Ive got to get back on a plane to get home. MY HUSBAND says thats Ive got COURAGE cos it take it to do it
Just book it pack it and go. I ride a Motor b ike im 36 times more like to die on that than a car
AND only god knows how many miliuons of times less like to die in a Plane so DO IT be BRAVE U CAN
OH and IM the same with Dentists but I go
-
Well done Suzi Q. You can't be brave without being scared! The need to travel is greater the fear, which is why you can accommodate it. Doesn't make it easy though. Keep strong. :)
-
Well done Suzi Q you are one gutsy lady, that's what I call brave :)
I spend the flight looking at the crews faces to see if they look happy (silly I know). Once flying back from the Carabean, just after take off I had gone down the spiral staircase to the toilet and we hit a BIG air pocket......I was promptly sick. There was an area to sit with seat belts and every time I tried to go back up the steps, it got bumpy and I was made to sit down again.......I spent the best part of nine hours in a confined space with no windows ....needless to say it didn't help my fear of flying :'(
-
Lovely to see you on board SuziQ >wave<
Ellie - a spiral staircase :o on a 'plane :-\ ………. was it metal or wooden ;D. Sick is my biggest fear anywhere - :'(
Surely if someone moves the plane rocks …….. did you fly again?
-
Been on a plane with a staircase (not spiral though). Turbulence is one of the few things that doesn't bother me about flying. The planes are far too big to rock CLKD. :)
-
Think it was metal and yes I did fly again, but will always hate it, even though my son has explained all about turbulance . The pilots in fact enjoy it, gives them somthing to do.
-
Thank you Ju Ju and ellie
I am truley petrified but I cant let my fear overcome my life its too short
But Try sitting in air lounge for 3 hrs before then 8 hrs to Singapore then 3 hr wait then 14hrs to UK
HOrrific isnt the word but I do it
IM he same with dentists Im beyond Terror but I go with NormAn my bear dont laugh!
The Cures Disintergration album on my Iopd full blast the same clothes each time I photo them
Wear Mums rings have to go at 730am on a Wednesday sad really xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
HI CLKD BIG HUGSSS XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8)
-
Thanks SuziQ :)
I can't imagine a double decker plane :o ……… is it 1st Class upstairs then :-\ and how about loos ……. would never be enough for me. There's a current advert about an actress who wakes up and asks for a shower on a plane :o …….. and there's a bar :-\ …… Where's all the water stored and where doe it all GO :neutral:
-
The BA 747's have an upper deck accessed by a spiral staircase - think it's metal, but it has proper steps. Used to be used for business class but I think it's now their Premium Economy, and fairly sure they still have loos up there. Before flying I study the seat maps for many hours.......
-
Oh - can 1 have a look-see at the seating plan? Crikey ……….
-
It was a big plane, but apart from the toilets being downstairs and a little seating area, it was just a normal plane.....I have never flown business class in my life :-\.......Think of the poor stewardess who's job it was to stay down there for nine hours :o
Our MM Private plane will be all business class and our PP will make sure to take a route that has no turbulance ;D
-
http://www.virgin-atlantic.com/gb/en/the-virgin-experience/upperclass/upper-class-suite.html
There you go CKLD, you can read all about it. There is also a bar you can go and sit at and have a snack.
Virgins Upper Class and BA's business class are the same thing.
-
:thankyou: will have a look-see ;)
No toilets ;D - does 1 get a pillow and duvet 'free'?
-
One will get whatever one desires , our PP will see to that ;)
-
There are lots of toilets. Chair goes into a bed, and you get a pillow and duvet. Also an amenity kit with socks and a sleep mask in. A TV that you can watch 'in bed' or sat up.
-
I can get that at home :lol:
-
Im sure that I would be too afraid to fall asleep, my friend told me that the last time she flew long haul, she woke up with the plane falling, think it must have been over Africa or somewhere where there is plenty of air pockets, I would literally sh.t myself! :o
-
Lol, you can get that at home. But the flight is only the tool to get you to the holiday destination.