Menopause Matters Forum

General Discussion => This 'n' That => Topic started by: babyjane on July 27, 2015, 10:03:51 AM

Title: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: babyjane on July 27, 2015, 10:03:51 AM
What?  what did you think I meant  :whist:

we need a new mattress. husband prefers firmness, I prefer a bit of give (but not over soft).  It's going to be a tricky one and we will need to go to the local bed shop to try out several before we decide.

What do you prefer? medium, firm, orthopedic, block of conrete, hammock?  Just being nosy really  :)
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: honeybun on July 27, 2015, 10:07:28 AM
 :rofl:

Well a soft one is not much use  ;)

I don't like it too hard and definitely not orthopaedic. The only thing you can do is go to the bed shop and try and find something that suits you both.
Mind you I always feel a right charlie lying on a bed in the middle of a shop.  ::)


Honeyb
x
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: purplenanny on July 27, 2015, 10:12:41 AM
 ;D (http://;D)

Good luck with that one!

You can buy beds that are different each side.....not cheap though

Very embarrassing trying them out in the shop. You never lay like you do at home   :bed: (http://:bed:)
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Dancinggirl on July 27, 2015, 11:59:30 AM
I got a mattress that is not a zip together from John Lewis that has half in medium tension for me and the other side in firm tension for my husband (you can't turn it though) - it was expensive but I got it in the sale. You can get mattresses that zip together as well but they tend to be rather wide and expensive.  There are wonderful latex mattresses that come in different tensions - I bought one for our guest room and all our guests say it's really comfortable. There is a website that will do 2 slim mattresses you put together to make a 5 foot size - if you message me I will give you the link.  DG x
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: babyjane on July 27, 2015, 01:19:18 PM
that's very kind of you dancing girl, thank you but I don't wish to buy from a website.  We have a great local furniture store that we have used for all our beds/mattresses over the years and we will pay them a visit in the very near future.  Failing that we will visit John Lewis when we next go to our daughter's as we don't have a store near us. 

I was really just canvassing opinions about what people prefer in terms of comfort.
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: honeybun on July 27, 2015, 01:21:31 PM
Just behave when you are in the shop  ;D


Honeyb
X
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Gill Mojo on July 27, 2015, 01:38:40 PM
My advice? Go to bed shops and bounce ;) Nothing like practical, bums on, experience. I just bought a new bed and mattress; I got one of those memory foam doodads and I am amazed at how awesomely comfortable it is!. I'm on the large side and the mattress looked horribly thin, insubstantial, but I have had a few nights where I have woken up without bits of me in agony so it gets my seal of approval ;) Have fun hunting!
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: honeybun on July 27, 2015, 01:41:29 PM
Do the memory foam ones make the bed hotter.?

I'm needing a new bed too and was considering the foam one.


Honeyb
X
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Joyce on July 27, 2015, 01:50:06 PM
We bought a new mattress for our bed about 12 months ago. It's a posturpaedic one, springs with a memory foam topping. It so so comfortable & breathable.  Hubby fancied one of the tempur ones, but it was exorbitantly priced, plus being foam would have had him in a lather every night.  ::)
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: babyjane on July 27, 2015, 02:17:03 PM
I do find memory foam rather hot these days.  I used to have a Tempur pillow and it was great but as meno took hold I would wake with my neck and hair soaking wet.

Our KS bed was built in the bedroom so to change it we would need to dismantle it and as it was built to last, and last, and last.............we will make do with a new mattress.  Our current one is over 15 years old now and springs can be felt!  :o

this has all come about because the bedroom is being decorated  :)
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Gill Mojo on July 27, 2015, 02:38:41 PM
I do suspect the memory foam of adding a little to the heat, but as I sleep... erm... let's just say nightclothes aren't an issue :D..... and have the windows wide open all year round, pretty much, it hasn't made a vast difference to me personally, Honeyb
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: babyjane on July 27, 2015, 02:50:27 PM
ewwww, that sounds like bliss.  Part of the reason I spend some of the night in the spare bedroom is so I can have a 4.5tog duvet and the window open.  Husband is a cold mortal who not only likes a firm mattress but also a cosy duvet and the windows closed. Whose idea was it that couples have to sleep together?  ::)
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: CLKD on July 27, 2015, 02:54:03 PM
Avoid orthopaedic beds as these are usually far too hard!  Memory foam is far too hot!

We turn our mattress - apparently there's a Spring side and a Winter one  ::) ……. many years ago (about the same time as I had those curtains in the other thread) we purchased of a new mattress and it was awful - what I wasn't told in the shop was that there was a 60 day return option  >:(.  The next mattress on our 6'6" x 7' bed is wonderful ……..

Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: getting_old on July 27, 2015, 04:09:34 PM
Firm, and the current mattress (which we've only had a few weeks) claims to have memory foam cooling gel, however I can't comment as we put one of those egg box tops onto it plus a thick mattress protector (the only one I could find which was deep enough).
Our previous memory foam mattress lasted for less than 3 years of actual use so I'm not overly impressed by them but they seem to be the only options these days. We ended up temporarily using the old orthopaedic bed for a few months and that was great.
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Dancinggirl on July 27, 2015, 04:21:58 PM
The mattress we got has a winter and a summer side but as I mentioned before we have to just top to toe it as one side is firm and my side is medium tension - it is good though.
If you do find your mattress is too hard then a topper can work wonders. I've tried memory foam toppers but they go flat really quickly and make me feel too hot. You can get latex mattress toppers and they last longer as they are more resilient and regulate the body temperature better.
Latex in natural, antibacterial( so bed bugs can't live in it) and, unlike memory, foam keeps you cool or at least won't make you over heat - which is rather important when menopausal. 
When buying latex you need to go for the better quality Talalay latex as it lasts longer. Dg x
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Winterose on July 27, 2015, 04:28:49 PM
Tried the latex and horribly hot and sweaty.  Husband had bad back for years when we had firm mattress , I was always stiff, , once children left home we treated ourselves to a bespoke bed , its zip and link, mine  is soft and his is medium, his back is cured and my stiffness 100% better, would rather have a fab bed than a fancy car, my advice is spend as much as you can afford
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Joyce on July 27, 2015, 05:11:58 PM
We used to have a water latex mattress. Summer side & winter side. Always had on summer side but would turn from end to end periodically. When we finally replaced it last year the underside of it was frankly, disgusting.

Would never have latex again. Daughter gave up on their one too & bought a spring mattress as her partner is a sweaty Beastie like my hubby.
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: oldsheep on July 27, 2015, 06:09:12 PM
used to have hard mattresses but hate them and they gave me back ache. We also need a new one as our IKEA one is lumpy now. Trouble is, it's a 160 so unless we change the bed, we're stuck with IKEA mattresses. I just want one that's comfy and can sink into, while not rolling into OH and not noticing when he gets out of bed.
We'll have to go to IKEA and jump on the mattresses. It has to be reasonably bendy too as has to get up our 55 stairs, with a turn over the banisters at the top where the ceiling height dips  :o
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Linsey44 on July 27, 2015, 08:56:00 PM
Hi HB We have a gel mattress that gives similar support to memory foam, but isnt as hot. The mattress also has 2000 springs with the gel layer on top of that Love it.  Did take a bit of getting used to.  It seems both firm and soft at the same time
Linsey x
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: CLKD on July 27, 2015, 09:48:39 PM
Water bed then  ;D ………. they can be switched on in the Winter  ;)
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: honeybun on July 27, 2015, 10:05:03 PM
Been on one of those and they make me queasy  ;D


Honeyb
X
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: CLKD on July 27, 2015, 10:07:18 PM
My friend has one of the newer models and loves it.  It doesn't sway like the older versions did, plus it heats up  ;)
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: honeybun on July 27, 2015, 10:08:33 PM
Oh heck, that would be all I need  ;D


Honeyb
X
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: CLKD on July 27, 2015, 10:10:41 PM
Her kitten was mystified  ;D

(can't you sleep either, is it the ribs keeping you awake  :-\ ? )
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Dyan on July 28, 2015, 06:06:16 PM
Not too hard, not too soft but just right ;D
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: CLKD on July 28, 2015, 06:06:47 PM
there's always one  ;D
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: honeybun on July 28, 2015, 07:22:47 PM
And a bowl of porridge in the morning  ::)


Honeyb
X
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: babyjane on July 29, 2015, 08:41:25 AM
pardon?  :neutral:
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Taz2 on July 29, 2015, 10:32:38 AM
And a bowl of porridge in the morning  ::)


Honeyb
X
Can bear-ly believe you said that  ;D ;D ;D

Taz x
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: babyjane on July 29, 2015, 11:44:43 AM
and the penny drops with a loud clunk  ::)
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: Taz2 on July 29, 2015, 12:53:36 PM
 :rofl:
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: CLKD on July 29, 2015, 11:05:09 PM
Porridge  :sick02:
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: babyjane on July 31, 2015, 09:03:28 AM
I love porridge.  I have it every morning all year round, with prunes  :)
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: CLKD on July 31, 2015, 03:31:35 PM
 :o - you and DH then although he's picking soft fruits from our garden to go in his. 

ReadyBrek though, warm and thin, not hot and thick ………
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: honeybun on July 31, 2015, 04:00:40 PM
Sounds like a description of some men I know  ;D


Honeyb
X
Title: Re: Firm or soft, which do you prefer?
Post by: babyjane on July 31, 2015, 04:45:34 PM
 :rofl: