Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Humour => The funny side of menopause => Topic started by: CLKD on June 06, 2015, 05:42:25 PM
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Aphorism a short, pointed sentence that emits/expresses a wise or clever observation or a general truth ......
1. The nicest thing about the future is that it always starts tomorrow.
2. Money will buy a fine dog, but only kindness will make him wag his tail.
3. If you don't have a sense of humour, you probably don't have any sense at all.
4. Seat belts are not as confining as wheelchairs.
5. A good time to keep your mouth shut is when you're in deep water.
6. How come it takes so little time for a child who is afraid of the dark
to become a teenager who wants to stay out all night?
7. Business conventions are important because they demonstrate
how many people a company can operate without.
8. Why is it that at class reunions you feel younger than everyone else looks?
9. Stroke a cat and you will have a permanent job.
10. No one has more driving ambition than the teenage boy who wants to buy a car.
11. There are no new sins; the old ones just get more publicity.
12. There are worse things than getting a call for a wrong number
at 4 a.m.; for example, it could be the right number.
13. No one ever says "It's only a game" when their team is winning.
14. I've reached the age where 'happy hour' is a nap.
15. Be careful about reading the fine print. There's no way you're going to like it.
16. The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.
17. Do you realize that, in about 40 years, we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos?
18. Money can't buy happiness, but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Cadillac than in a Chevy.
19. After 65, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you're probably dead
20. Always be yourself because the people who matter don't mind and
the ones who mind don't matter.
21. Life isn't tied with a bow, ~ ~ ~ but it's still a gift
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Brilliant CLKD, just read them out to hubby....trouble is we agree with almost all of them.
Thanks, that made us both laugh.
Honeybun
X
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Thank you CKLD - funny, true and wise. FAB - DG xxxxxx
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No 14 suits me ;)
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Brilliant - loved these !
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I plan to read no 7 to OH later on ;D thanks!
I also like one that it's amazing how many powerful people ignore - When you're in a hole, stop digging.
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With Skype available I'm amazed at how many people still go on Conferences ;D
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This always makes me laugh. Whenever somebody has mislaid something "It'll be in the last place I look" ;D