Menopause Matters Forum
General Discussion => This 'n' That => Topic started by: dazned on February 26, 2015, 03:54:25 PM
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Just had an awful shocking text my husband's boss went to hospital for an appointment this morning, 3 hours later he had passed away there !! :'(
Terrible ,just terrible. I'm all shaking now !!
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:hug:
What a terrible thing to happen. Was he ill or just a coincidence that he was at hospital.
Sit down and have a cuppa. Will your hubby be in soon.
Honeyb
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Oh how sad. He was obviously poorly poorly, no doubt you will have more details as the days go by. Expect there may be a post mortem unless it was obvious that he had an under-lying condition, hence the Appt..
:hug:
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Hubby will be in soon thank God just to hug him will be wonderful x
No the man was at work this morning the hospital is 2 min walk away he was just there for appointment as far as we know,might know more when DH home ,very distressing his poor family !
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And my husband is very depressed at the moment what with worrying about what's going on with me this will really affect him badly
Thanks for your support. Xx
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Is your DH getting support for his depression?
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No he won't go to doctors I've tried to get him to go just refuses :-\
Oh dear sometimes life stinks !
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How does his depression affect him? Is it low mood: does he wake in the early hours, how is his appetite …….. don't let him 'blame' your symptoms for his depression!
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So sorry, what a horrible shock for everyone, especially the family. Thinking of you.
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So sorry dazned.
Thinking of you both X :hug:
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Goodness, what a shock for everyone.
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Thank you all ,feeling a bit better now hubby home
Persuaded him to pop out for an hour with a pal across the road or that he will open up about anything you know what men are like ! ;)
CLKD he wakes early and low mood in himself but eating ok.but obviously he is worried about me ,we only have each other ,well I mean no family,parents kids etc. It's only natural I guess he wouldn't be human if he didn't :-\
But then the vicious circle begins doesn't it .x
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Maybe try and find something to do together that you both enjoy. For hubby and I its a community garden. Think allotement only smaller. We go together and have met lots of people. It takes us away from problems and I relax and so does he.
It could be anything, walking...yoga, dancing...oh anything at all.
If hubby and I stay in the house then it can become oppressive. You have weekends together. Try and think of something you both might enjoy and go and spend quality time together.
Might just be a Coast or country walk but you will be amazed what a difference just making a little effort will have.
Honeyb
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I really agree. We have always done everything together, being joined at the hip almost ::)
Charity shops; auctions; antique fairs; walking, cycling, gardening, sitting; reading; DH cooks and I clean; fishing, sport, watching some sports on TV ……… we don't have friends in/out, we don't have family visiting, we have a good relationship with the Bank and our FA. Since he retired DH often stands and tells me he's enjoying 'this' :-* …….
I had pen-pals for years, some are now e-mail friends. We had a dog which took us to places we would never have visited. We love going to towns across the UK: Durham, Stamford, Brighton, Lewes …...
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Update,
Now know the cause 're DH boss,he didn't have a hospital appointment as I thought he was at work and said he didn't feel right so he walked just round the corner to hospital to get looked over ,a few hours later he had passed away! It was an aortic aneurysm in the stomach how very tragic, really scary!
How fragile life is ,really upset me and I didn't even really know the poor man :'(
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My hubby had a scan for that a few weeks ago. We were told it was fine. It is seemingly more common than you think in men hence the new scanning programme.
I'm really glad I insisted.
What a dreadful thing to have happened, his poor family.
Honeyb
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Not to sure what one is really :-\
Don't you get any symptoms,he'd been to see gp a couple of times last week they gave him antibiotics for chest infection !
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Your post really made me think, my DH went for an aortic aneurysm scan on Monday as he has reached 65 and was sent an invite. He was very reluctant and only went at my urging. Everything was OK and it doesn't need repeating. I am so glad I made him go and so sorry for the shock you and DH have had with his boss.
Take care of each other.
Thorntrees.
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That's good HB and Thorntrees didn't realise they now do routine scanning for it. But you both glad you made them go xx
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When it bursts it's fatal. My late F in L had a successful operation for an aeortic anurisym in 1998, [aged 78] he had been monitored for several years by ultra-sound scanning. Now men over 65 are offered it. It can be genetic. We talked to our GP at the time ………. B in L had his scan last year and is OK.
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Funnily enough (or not funny really) a really close of mine had this happen while he was in the A&E department because of damaging his thumb at work. He felt sick and went to the toilets while waiting to be seen and the next thing he knew it was three months later and he woke up in Intensive Care. His aorta burst while he was in the toilet and he collapsed but luckily someone was in the next cubicle and called for help. He had to have over thirty units of blood as it was rushing out as quickly as it was being put in. He was never the same of course. No feeling down the left side of his body. What a brave guy though. Didn't let it beat him. His sense of humour was still very much there. He lived for another twenty years after that. He was told that his smoking had caused it. He would not have survived if he hadn't already been in the hospital and there were times during the first couple of years when he really wished he hadn't. I still miss his company. He was 49 when it happened.
Such a shock for all involved when this happens. On a better note my next door neighbour's was recognised in A&E before it ruptured and he had successful surgery. Didn't manage to keep his job but at least he's alive. He's 53 so I'm not sure why we have to wait till 65 for the scan!
Taz x
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Neighbour passed with that last summer. He knew he had it. He'd been told it would go one day & he would pass very quickly. He did, watching TV.
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Thanks Taz. I had only heard the 'fatal' stories. It can be distressing to watch though ……..
My late F in L had smoked a lot whilst a Prisoner of War ……… then suddenly stopped when he developed a cough in his late 50s.
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Hopefully as the scanning programme roll out this will become less common. Hubby did not want to go ::) but he went, purely to shut me up I think.
I have to say I was relieved that everything was ok as he is a smoker.
Honeybun
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I think whilst the NHS is offering these free tests we should take the opportunity. It may well be that someone will get a Degree out of the Research!