Menopause Matters Forum
General Discussion => This 'n' That => Topic started by: honeybun on November 14, 2014, 08:20:52 PM
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Need some inspiration ladies.
I cook all of mum's food and I'm stumped. As most of you know she is 92 and physically quite frail.
Her stomach just won't accept much now so it has to be very bland.
At the moment all she eats is fish and macaroni and the occasional lamb chop and some chicken. Almost no veg or fruit now as it gives her the runs.
I used to cook her mince and potatoes and winter stews and some hot pot.
All of the above just don't suit any more.
I'm at a loss as to what to cook for her.
When I ask what she would like she can't remember and if I try anything different it does not go down well.
It has to be something that can be frozen and then heated up in the microwave.
Any thoughts at all. I suspect she may be anaemic as he does not eat any red meat or green veg.
Every thing in her body is wearing out including her stomach and bowels.
Help.
Anyone else cook for a very old and fussy lady.
Honeyb
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What about some good thick homemade soup, lentil perhaps adding in spinach for some iron, broth, chicken rice? Oh it must be hard HB especially at that age, hope some of the ladies come up with good ideas for you
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Just thought the soups would probably run through as well! Sorry
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It's so difficult - I remember having the same problem with my mum and dad and there was no easy answer although they didn't suffer from digestion problems apart from when my mum was either too low or too high in potassium. They did become very fixed in what they wanted to eat and their appetite was not good for a lot of the time. If you think she may be anaemic then perhaps you should ask her doc to carry out routine blood tests. Is she on multi vitamins?
Taz x :hug:
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Fish pie with a potato topping? Stovies with corned beef (sacrilegious to one coming from the north where we always ate them plain!). Milk puddings or jelly and fruit. Creamed rice or custard. Porridge. Quiche Lorraine. Any of that help?
Bramble
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Sis makes her soup but it's very watered down. She is not bad at taking puddings and yogurt.
It's her evening meal that's the problem..I cooked her lemon sole for tonight and I was told it was tasteless ::).
Taz...district nurse is due to take blood and give her a MOT.
I have tried her with quiche but she doesn't like it cold and I have turned off the power to her oven....She is no longer safe to use it. She stores stuff in there....No idea why, and then turns on the oven....when she can remember how to ....and then wonders what the burning smell is.
Difficult one as she has little appetite and really can't be bothered with food at all.
Honeyb
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It's very difficult HB. My mother is only 75 but as you know is a bit brain damaged . She used to be meat and two veg person. But now her life involves carers I too have to think of meals that can be microwaved and it's hard when you don't live in the same house. She has her main meal at lunch time. They do meals for one in marks - very small portions - say some lamb with 2 new potatoes and tasty gravy. They are very nice . My mother had a big appetite so these are too small for her but may suit your mum. Can be microd in 3 mins. My mother also doesn't like microwaved veg so she will have cooked chicken breast and mashed potato ( again from marks- very nice ) plus some instant gravy, the carers prep that with no problems. She will the have a cake at tea time and maybe a piece of bread and some crisps at 7.
She doesn't eat anything we eat - jacket potatoes, pasta or anything remotely spicy. So M&S have been my saviour. We tried other ready meals and she didn't like them.
It is difficult though and worse for you as you don't have carers for mum do you?
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Carers are early morning and then bedtime. She is, at the moment, just capable of heating up a dinner or making a sandwich at lunch time.
It would seem that red meat is becoming harder to digest and sends her running for the loo, and there is my problem. When I could give her some stews I had much more choice. Now I'm stuck.
Marks and Spencer's is great....unfortunately she doesn't like them ::)
Honeyb
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Oh dear HB, you try so hard to please her too. My FIL had difficulty swallowing food, so it almost had to be pureed. I think this happens to a lot of old folk. My aunt was a live in carer for an old lady. I remember she mainly ate milky puds/jellies. Porridge maybe. You get these ones you can make in the microwave nowadays, even some with some flavour.
Cullen skink soup, mind you not sure how well that reheats. She'd get some flavour in that. Fish pie as bramble suggested, corned beef hash with more tatties than beef.
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HB
Would she benefit from these nutritional drinks you get on prescription can't remember the name...they come milky or juice small bottle 200ml I think and provide 300cals plus all the vitamins they need.
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Ensure drinks various flavours x
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Potato cheese , again soups, chicken with a little gravy, rice pudding, welsh rarebit , warm sponge with a little custard, shepherds pie??
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Quorn mince?
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I'd be lost without M&S honeybun. Oh dear don't know what to suggest. When she was having problems with her appetite and so eating anything was a challenge, we did have the ensure drinks - 300 calorie milk shake so they were a good meal replacement but she soon went off them.
I struggle with meals to be honest. We did buy a deep fat fryer and so she can have some chips and chicken breast prepped by carer. She can't do anything herself. I went down tonight at 9pm as normal and she had confused the tv remote control with the sweetex dispenser. She was clicking sweetex into her cup ( presumably thinking it was the remote ??) saying she could only get dads army :(. She was fine by the time I left but without me she gets very very confused. Massive pressure . My sister is in Orlando :(
Sorry HB not relevant to your post :)
Night all xxxx
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HB do you have to cook her meals at her house? if not why not cook a casserole or stew at home.
I have made some really appetising ones, just putting lots nourishing ingredients in, last week I slung in some chicken thighs ( more tasty then breast, though it might be better to use deboned chicken for your mum) bought some mixed Mediterranean vegs with potatoes already prepared (for roasting really) some good stock and at the last moment decided to add orange juice.
It was delicious eaten with chunky bread and butter.
The leftovers were even better the next day.
I am going to buy some rabbit next ( getting more popular again)
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That's what I used to do SL. At that point she was eating almost normally but now anything with a gravy just runs through her. I used to do lots of meals for her here then freeze them and take them to her house.
I will make her a fish pie and see how that goes down. She will eat chicken but heating it without a gravy dries it up.
The GP won't prescribe the nutritional drinks as she can eat.
It's just difficult to ring the changes with such a limited choice.
Honeyb
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I have forgotten the name of them but that company that does frozen meals for delivery. Have a look at their catalogue of meals and it will maybe give you some ideas for things you can cook yourself and freeze.
Bramble
(quiche can be heated in the microwave I think).
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Sorry HB new to this thread and should have read it properly, I see your dilemma now.
Adding Hellmans mayonnaise with mustard ( or regular) to the mash will make it tastier and adding grated cheese as a topping.
There is Complan that you can buy, you could make it tastier by chocolate, does she like Horlicks or malted drinks they have added vitamins.
Home made soups have been suggested, in our part of the world we can buy vegetables already diced ( they call them Pot Herbs) from the Markets.
I buy them add extra ingredients and stock, simmer for 2O mins add a little butter and then use hand blender.
Though as you say things are inclined to go straight through, so only blend a little so there is still bulk to the soup.
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Wiltshire Farm Foods, is that what you mean Bramble? A disabled friend of mine tried them but seemed to think they were rather high in salt?
My mum was diabetic with a small appetite but she didn't seem to mind eating the same meals several times a week. she wasn't really interested in variety.
when she was ill she was prescribed the Fortesip cartons even though she could eat because she could not eat sufficient to sustain her so the cartons gave her the nutrients she was missing.
I used to work in a care home and one old lady refused all foods but would eat chocolate buttons and ice cream. All meals would be thrown at the wall. the doctor was called and his verdict was to give her what she would eat to keep her calm and not stressed. At over 90 a balanced diet was the least of her worries. Funnily enough when the staff stopped trying to make her eat a dinner and gave her chocolate buttons on a plate, after a few days the awkard old lady wanted a dinner :)
Can you not just give mum what she likes Honeybun?
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I do try to give her something tasty and nutritious, it's just that she complains that almost everything runs through her so is eating less and less variety.
She won't even attempt a vegetable now.
It's fish fish and more fish and she is getting fed up with it. She just doesn't know what she wants.
She does have Horlicks every night made by the carers.
I have looked at Wiltshire Farm foods for ideas but they are mostly meat and two veg and the dreaded gravy.
At a bit of a loss really.
Honeyb
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How about a light chicken stew / casserole, then the sauce / gravy could be light rather than heavy or fatty.
You could also be selective as to the amount of vegetables that go in.
Something I've seen, but not tried, are thin slices of potato across the top of casseroles. That cooks while the meat burbles away underneath, could be flashed under a grill at the end to brown.
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That sounds like Lancashire Hot Pot Limpy, though its layered.
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Egg Mornay?
At least the boiled eggs would stop the loose bowels.
X
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Something I've seen, but not tried, are thin slices of potato across the top of casseroles. That cooks while the meat burbles away underneath, could be flashed under a grill at the end to brown.
Like a hotpot Limpy?
Taz x
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Forgive me for this HB but I thought it would make you laugh and cheer you up :)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8l-EyOkw3bs
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Something I've seen, but not tried, are thin slices of potato across the top of casseroles. That cooks while the meat burbles away underneath, could be flashed under a grill at the end to brown.
Like a hotpot Limpy?
Taz x
Yes, just like a hotpot Taz.
It might stay "drier" and be easier to adjust portion amount - not sure :-\
I'd forgotten about hotpots ::)
Had dimly remembered something M&S used to do (many moons ago)
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Well thanks ladies, I have had a few ideas.
Just back from the supermarket, on the menu next week will be fish pie....got a bit of cod loin.
Shepherds pie...with corned beef,
Chicken hot pot with sliced potatoes on top
Oh and fish ;D
I will let you all know how it goes. Fingers crossed something is acceptable out of that lot.
Honeyb
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Fingers crossed HB. You have tried your best, no more you can do really.
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I just had a thought honeybun, if mum's food is giving her the runs could it be going through her system too fast? Is there anything her doctor could give her to help slow down the transit? If she was more comfy in that department she could be more inclined to eat her food? Just a thought. Good luck this week xx
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Never really thought of that BJ so thank you.
The district nurse is due in so we could start with her. They deal with old people so perhaps she would have some idea if that would be possible.
Honeyb
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What reason has the doc given for her tummy problems Honeybun? I know that my mum had similar although she was diabetic and quite poorly anyway. She then developed a zinc deficiency which made her very tired and irritable - although some of that may have been her worsening dementia. So many possible causes I suppose.
Taz x :hug:
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From all that HB has said in the past, it sounds as though her stomach is matching her attitude to HB!! - acidic and acerbic!
Bramble
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:rofl:
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Had another idle thought for your Mum's diet in the future HB
N.B - After this weeks shop.
I seem to remember in Chinese restaurants they thicken sauces with cornflour. It did give a very different texture to sauces. Perhaps it might work to give lighter cottage or shepherds pie.
Just seen Bramble's post - she does seem to have a point
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That reminds me too, I use coconut powder to thicken, it gives casseroles a lovely flavour. It might add a bit of interest.
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:rofl:
You could well be right. She has asked my sister to buy and and cook a chicken for her. The reason being she thinks sis will buy from M&S whereas I will buy from Aldi.
Hubby says I have to tell her it comes from Harrods and then she will eat it.
Aldis chicken.....Oh my goodness surely not. ::)
Honeyb
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Another thought that might partly explain your mother's complaint that food is tasteless - does she still have a sense of taste (and smell)?
My mother is 86 and in perfectly good health but has no sense of taste or smell any more she tells me, so she can't really taste her food - whether it's delicious or boring. I think it's something that happens to some people as they get older. In fact it is beginning to happen to me I'm sorry to say, and I will be sad if it goes completely as I enjoy food!
If this is the case then flavour will be less important and perhpas the appearance of the food - to make it appear more appetising, might help?
Just an idea that occurred to me having read what your mum has said honeybun.
Hurdity x
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Aldis chicken.....Oh my goodness surely not. ::)
Honeybun my dear late mum always bought her chicken from the local Aldi. She had chicken regularly and always found them most acceptable.
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Last night I typed a lovely long message last night, pressed 'go' but the link dropped out :cuss:
My suggestion was that some medications can cause alteration of taste as can lack of minerals, i.e. zinc.
Lemon sole can be tasteless anyway. Also, if there is butter on her spuds i.e. mash, then the oil can cause upset bowels. Onions? these upset me within 12 hours :-X - usually downwards.
Have a look at a Jewish cookbook, apparently chicken soup cures most ills! ;) …… bland food is good for upset tums and scrambled egg was suggested years ago for recovering patients. Or a poached egg? I can't tolerate eggs.
Diced chicken: grilled: on a bed of plain boiled rice? Add salt and pepper for taste. Same with fish, something more tasty like mackerel fillets if oil isn't make her bowel runny. Again, a bed of plain rice.
Rice pudding from a tin? Semonlina? lines the gut. Also, LIVE yoghurt and Actimel to assist 'bacteria'.
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Last night I typed a lovely long message last night, pressed 'go' but the link dropped out :cuss:
CLKD - Our broadband keeps collapsing too - Welcome to my world ::)
Honeyb - Have you managed to find any food that is suitable for your Mum?
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We were 'sharing' with 'down the road' ::)
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Fish pie tonight. She did not comment when I called her so who knows.
She thinks she has yet another bladder infection so that was all she could talk about.
Hey ho...I just keep plugging in there.
I don't think there is actually anything wrong with her stomach or bowels. She is just very very old and things get worn out and slow down.
Now I do think there is something wrong with her bladder but that's another story.
Honeyb
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I think the important bit is just to get food down her regardless of whether it is 'healthy' or not. Yoghurts, complan and the fortesip drinks have all been suggested before. How about trifle, lucozade, these little pots of choc mousse, cream of chicken soup and angel delights? All easily eaten.
Bramble
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It must be hard HB, I know when my Mum was bad it was a struggle to get her to eat anything. If you have a Waitrose near you in their freezer cabinets they do a range of food in much smaller portions, cottage pie, chilli, all sorts of things. Being Waitrose they were good quality and Mum could either cook them in the oven or get them out to defrost then microwave them......
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Since her fall Mum tells us that she isn't eating the same :-\ - I think she sleeps more than she admits and she has had trouble with her reef but won't tell her Dentist >:( ……..
Little and often maybe? Is your Mum using the VA-type treatment that we talked about - did you ever get the Pads?