Menopause Matters Forum
General Discussion => This 'n' That => Topic started by: changesbabe on May 01, 2012, 11:12:41 AM
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Ok ladies I really need your encouragement, advice and support! Three years ago I had the biggest panic attack ever at Glasgow Airport - how I got on that plane I will never know but i did (by the way wasn't in meno hell then but had just experienced a sudden bereavement!). The following year I managed to go abroad twice and one of these times was in the volcanic ash fiasco - ended up with an extra week's holiday! However later that year meno hell started - hundreds of migraines, night sweats, anxiety blah blah you know the stuff. Well last year I barely made it to Wales and the Lakes but felt glad that we got away. I was however disappointed not to have had the sunshine. Hubby is a scuba diver and whilst he was happy to support me I know he missed his diving.
Well this year I have had a glimpse of finding the strength/courage to go abroad. I have found a holiday to Corfu - everything is perfect - flight times, location, kids have been granted their annual leave etc.. now all I need to do is book it.
And there's the hard bit. Its my anxiety that's stopping me. Some days I can hardly get out the front door just now. Shopping at times feels impossible as does driving and there are other days where I feel normal again. All these activities though I can break down into small steps, I can practice, I can get people to chum me but getting on a plane there is no way to do this - I just have to do it! What if I can't? How will I know if I can? There are drugs I can take - I have beta blockers and diazepam in the cupboard but will that be enough. My fear is not of the flight but my anxiety! I am terrified that my anxiety will overwhelm me and i won't be able to do it. I hate airports - feel trapped and that is where my anxiety will be at its worst. Also the flight is in the morning - also when my anxiety is at its worst.
And yet the thought of not going fills me with such disappointment and it will feel even harder next year - I almost feel I have to face this demon to crush it - but please tell me how I hit the 'book it now' button!! xxx
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Do the diazepam stop the anxiety H&S? Because if they do do you haven't got anything to worry about because they can be in your bag as a back up.
A girl at work has just come back from Mexico, it's the first time she has flown long haul for many years because she is petrified of flying. She went to the doctor and got some tablets to help her get though it. She took a tablet every 4 hours ( and had a drink on the plane) and she survived. She had a great time and is going to do long haul again next year.
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I have a friend who takes Diazepam before flying due to her fear of it and it works for her. I wonder if a short course of hypnotherapy would help nearer to the date? In the meantime, get hubby to hit the button for you ;)
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I am going through the same issues - I have in mind a holiday in Italy but as soon as I begin planning my anxiety stops me going further. :'( ......... I know how ill I feel and how restrictive symptoms can be. At least in the UK I can if ncessary come home but from abroad? :hug:
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Gosh when i read the title i was just thinking of writing something on the same lines but the daft thing is i am only going to the isle of wright and i dont know for certain when i am going, but have kinda worked it out from things that have been said by daughter and if i am right its a month today and i am dreading it already keep going over and over it in my mind the thought of being away from home is killing me. I have not been away from home for years and this is the furthest i have been in say 15 years. But i did take some hope in that you said you at least got away in this country, can i ask how was the anxiety when you were away? tell me worts and all lol. I am like you but have been like that for 21 years.
But i have to tell you that when i was very bad i went on my first ever 18 to 30 holiday i was about 38 at that time lol. It was my one and only time on a plane and my friend had to sit on my legs i was shaking that much and it was not so bad, but coming back i was dreadful but thats because other things had gone on while we were away and i never slept for the whole 2 weeks we were away,
You have a understanding hubby, and you want to please him and your children so thats a good thing. Take the diazipam and also take a paper bag with you and just breath into that if you need too. It so hard to say anything as i truely do know how you feel. A good friend of mine suffers too and each year she makes herself go away she keeps asking me but so far i have not been able to do it. She says that you have to just do it, So go for it, Lets say that if i can go to isle of wright then you can go on a plane sorry i know i have the easier option but believe me if you knew me and that even on my birthday i could not go for a half mile ride away going to the isle of wright is going to be a ball breaker ha ha. I hope i have helped a little.
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I worried about the ferry to the Isle of Wight but it was a fine day so we could sit outside and I tried to keep my mindon the egrets in the mud flats ......... over the years I have worried myself almost to death but have gone alone with hImself because he has been so good during my various states of health. Usually once we arrive I improve for years we went self catering so that I didn't have to eat 'out', or mix with crowds; now with the beta-blockas I can go into cafes etc.. with hardly any problems. We also stay in hotels and whereas breakfast had to be carried to our room now I can just manage to eat down stairs. Sometimes it has been hard work and I've wanted to get home fast: so that I can look back to see whether I had a good time: or not ::)
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Hello H&S.
It must be terrible to feel that way. It is how you feel and how you think, so fortunately, you can change that. As littleminnie said, her friend made it and had a fabulous time and that is perhaps what you could focus on - the holiday and not getting there.
My Dad had asthma later in life and had taken a panic attack on one plane - it put him off flying. We got him some relaxation techniques, booked seats with extra legroom at the exits and aisle seat so he could move up and around if he had too. He also got pills from the doctor to help. He managed to go on the family holiday (we were flying in from different parts of the world) - with no idea that 2 years later he would not be with us. He talked about that holiday and memories regularly since he came back - no mention of the anxiety before.
Some thoughts for you : CBT (Cognitive Behaviour Therapy) which should help your overall anxiety; relaxation techniques, yoga or meditation.
Plan and book the seating in advance to give you opportunity to move around and in and out of the seat.
Plan the journey to be pleasurable for you - food you could take, drink, reading, i-pod, movies, crosswords, knitting even!
Perhaps taxi or special car to the airport and at the other side.
If you don't like airports, plan arrival in time so that you just go through and more or less get on the plane.
Many of our airports are much more pleasurable experiences now - breakfast, shopping. Could you incorporate that into your journey so that you are not in the position that causes your anxiety? Like wait to buy your favourite lipstick or perfume or something else?
Can you get an express pass through to avoid the longer queues?
I hope some of these ideas help Hot&Spicy. The mind is a powerful thing - but the good thing it, that power can be harnessed to change the way we think and feel about things.
Whether you believe you can, or believe you cannot - you are right! (Hendyr Ford)
Go hit that button and start planning what a fantastic time you are going to have.
Have a fantastic holiday!!!
Fx
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Hot & Spicy
The fear is always so much worse than the reality when we deal with the actual situation. I know exactly how your feeling am holding back aswell but for different reasons at the moment.
You Must book it and go.
Life is too short for this to hold us all back from doing fun things.
Sending you strength
Ricky
XX
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Hi hot and spicy, During the lead up to my meno meltdown last May I had a major panic attack in the hot and busy airport before flying home to the UK after a lovely holiday (though I reckon certain stresses in the hire car coming back through an unfamiliar city helped cause the attack along with hunger). It did pass and I did get on the plane.
However, it has left me with real doubt as to whether I can face going abroad again (though I now at least imagine myself abroad, which I couldn't do last year at all!) It's not the flying that concerns me, it's the fear of bringing on severe anxiety that will result in me making a complete prat of myself! I'm 80% sure that once on holiday, I'll have a lovely time after I settle in to it after a couple of days.... But my head tells me "what if you freak out abroad and are desperate to get home and can't???" Being away from home feels scary. I have been away in the UK twice seen my meltdown last year and had to take a really small dose of valium for the journey and here and there during the time away...but I'm so glad I went as it proved to me that I am making progress.
You're absolutely right - we have to face these demons to prove them wrong.. life's too short.
You could also visit Paul Mckenna's website as he has a download there to do with fear of flying which is not expensive and may help you.
Meanwhile get your husband to press send!
Good luck
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This time last year something horrible happened to me and I was diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and the person involved was sent to prison. I don't think I ever talked about it on here but I ws very poorly for a lot of last year, although I may have come on here sounding perfectly OK. I am still having counselling.
I have been absolutely terrified of being in similar situations and I no longer venture far by myself. I also now suffer from anxiety, panic attacks and claustrophobia. All things which have never affected me in my life. :(
I went on holiday in March and psyched myself up. There was just me and my DD. I was OK going on the plane and for about a third of the journey and then I started feeling very anxious. I took a good book, some Bach Flower Rescue Remedy, some water and a relaxation tape which I had to listen to non-stop. I was never so glad to get to the hotel.
I felt ill for the first couple of days but then started calming down and finally enjoyed myself.
Coming home I booked an aisle seat (where I felt less claustrophobic) and I kept telling myself that I'd made it there so I'd make it home too. I really do sympathise with anyone on here who has anxiety so you could try some of the things I mentioned. Probably the relaxation tape was best. I just kept playing and replaying it.
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Hi hot and spicy, During the lead up to my meno meltdown last May I had a major panic attack in the hot and busy airport before flying home to the UK after a lovely holiday (though I reckon certain stresses in the hire car coming back through an unfamiliar city helped cause the attack along with hunger). It did pass and I did get on the plane.
However, it has left me with real doubt as to whether I can face going abroad again (though I now at least imagine myself abroad, which I couldn't do last year at all!) It's not the flying that concerns me, it's the fear of bringing on severe anxiety that will result in me making a complete prat of myself! I'm 80% sure that once on holiday, I'll have a lovely time after I settle in to it after a couple of days.... But my head tells me "what if you freak out abroad and are desperate to get home and can't???" Being away from home feels scary. I have been away in the UK twice seen my meltdown last year and had to take a really small dose of valium for the journey and here and there during the time away...but I'm so glad I went as it proved to me that I am making progress.
You're absolutely right - we have to face these demons to prove them wrong.. life's too short.
You could also visit Paul Mckenna's website as he has a download there to do with fear of flying which is not expensive and may help you.
Meanwhile get your husband to press send!
Good luck
I am not scared of flying but I am now scared of situations where I'm "trapped". This probably sounds crazy as in a plane you might think I'd feel trapped but my brain tells me I can choose to move around if I want to. However, my DD was in the window seat I was in the middle seat and an elderly man was in the aisle seat. He sat with his hand up resting on the seat in front and that was just enough to make me feel "trapped" and cause me to panic.
I then had several days imagining, like you, about what would happen if I couldn't get home. We were only away a week so I figured that by the time I had reorganised flights home (to another airport) the week would nearly be up and I'd spoil DD's holiday too. I just took it one day at a time and told myself I'd coped the day before so I could do it again the next day.
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Diazepam works for me when flying - just takes the edge off the whole experience. Plus once you're up in the air you will relax. I hadn't flown for over 20 years and I think this just made me feel even more nervous.
Now my youngest daughter lives in Tenerife and I feel that I need to be 'brave' to go and see her. I've done the trip 3 times now. Yes I still feel very nervous but the diazepam definitely helps.
Bryher
:cat48:
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I have the opposite problem OH won't go on holiday as he says he needs to know he is near a hospital, the last time we went away it was only to Bath and we ended up in A&E with OH with AF and anxiety. He won't fly for the same reason.
I love airports and planning holidays, but I think it would have to be alone, but I want to share these things with OH and I don't think it will happen, its lucky that we are both well traveled just not with each other.
I would say if you are anxious about the whole thing of holidays, just put one foot in front of another and do it. Think with your feet and not your head, its the only way.
silverlady x
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"It is how you feel and how you think, so fortunately, you can change that ...... " if I had a £1 for every psychologist who told me that I would be Very Rich Indeed >:(. It is NEVER how I think. It is the feelings that take over and ground me. I become a physically shaking wreck unable to function. Even the furniture shakes :-\. A psychologist once asked me what I thought about before panic set in and would not realise - because she had NEVER had a panic attack - that it happens; out of the blue; that I don't need a thought pattern for it to begin ........... CBT helps very few people and how many psychologists contact patients that don't return to sessions? I never met one in 15 years of therapy that phoned to see whether I had improved, whether their services had helped etc.; usually I left because it was a waste of my money and time :'(
Anxiety for me is physical. Grounding. Dis-enabling >:(
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Add me to that list of people who stop going CLKD! I saw a woman most of last year and this year was transferred to a colleague of hers who apparently goes a bit deeper.
I went a couple of times & then she decided we should talk more about the incident which happened to me. I said I'd talked plenty to my hubby, friends, the police, victim support etc. But she wants me to re-live it by talking as if it's happening right now. That really unnerved me and I started feeling anxious just thinking about it! :( I ended up crying in her office for about half an hour, came out feeling drained and had to go straight home.
I then rang up and cancelled the next appointment because I couldn't face crying again! I am still undecided whether to re-book another appt. but she hasn't contacted me yet.
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Your posts made me cry - you ladies are amazing! I knew you would be that's why I posted. So many tips to try - I keep telling myself that it is only adrenalin. I know that I always feel better as the day goes on and am always worse in the morning. Am very shaky just now having just come back from docs - watch this space and I will let you know if I get it booked. Xxx
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Hi CLKD
I am not a psychologist and it was not a trite comment, nor was it intended to anger anyone, so I apologise unreservedly to anyone who felt angered or annoyed by it.
I lived through anxiety attacks years ago. I attended hypnosis and CBT & NLP as well as yoga, meditation and other 'self help' type sessions/experiences. I also learned a lot about the mind-body link, and stored emotions/physiological reactons.
As a result of that work, and in particular CBT, I rarely suffer from anxiety attacks at all now. I am like a different person. Yes, it started with the 'feelings', the physical reactions and then my head took over, making it worse. Too much to go into here, but I learned how to acknowledge the feelings, process the thoughts differently and remove the anxiety from my mind. Right now, I cannot remember the last time I had an anxiety attack although I apply the same process when dealing with difficult situations or upsets.
In contrast to your comment about CBT helping very few people, I know of several people who have been helped quite radically by CBT. In fact, those people I know who have attended CBT counselling and other types, have found it much more helpful than the other counsellings. One shoe does not fit every foot though, I appreciate that.
So, my post was intended to be helpful and constructive with various ideas. It may be a combination of many actions over a period of time, that will relieve her anxiety. I believe it must be horrible for Hot and Spicy to feel that way about the holiday she has found, and I do hope she finds a way to manage the situation and have a fabulous time.
Good Post Mrs. P. We should all learn to trust ourselves to know what is best for us.
Fx
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Hot and spicy just noticed this thread after posting on other ......
I'm of the take a diazepam' opinion. I'd quite like to go abroad but don't much fancy the airport etc but I defo think I'd force myself through it to be abroad.
Not long been away in uk and this time last year could barely get out front door . Im quite flabbergasted at this meno business and how the physical symptoms and their unpredictability impacts ones life !!
I have flown lots of times and to be honest there are lots of anxious flyers, when I think back to some of the flights I've been on I'm sure I can remember quite a few faces that looked extrmely glad to get off.
I think if you have flown before and you have a back up Valium in your purse you would more than likely be fine. If you don't feel ready to go abroad just yet don't beat yourself up about it you can go as soon as your ready too. Lots of nice places in UK and we may get a lovely July and August .
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Nothing is 'only' or 'just' ....... ;)
"only adrenalin" ....... can cause me to shiver for hours. A psychologist once told me that a panic attack can only last 10 mins ....... I could have swung for her >:( - my longest attack was 3 days and nights ......... it's why it's called an 'attack'.
PennyFarthing - the more you look into psychology the more you will realise what you want from the sessions. I was afraid of making a mistake the first time I ever went ......... but the lady let me talk myself out and then I went back the next week for helpful coping strategies; some worked, others didn't. Another one I saw was quoting 'the book' at me and I could tell her which page she was remembering ::) ........... if it doesn't feel 'right' for you then go elsewhere. There are many types of therapy and many ways of 'experts' putting it over well enough to help the client. At first I wanted a 'cure' then Ir ealised that talking it 'out' of my head helped enormously - discuss, decide, ditch ;)
As for holidays: I woudl love to be able to pop onto a plane/train/coach and go places :'( but the anxiety is not worth it in many cases. I have however improved beyond all dreams! and now Himself and I go out and about as well as having holidays in the UK. Italian Lakes next ;)
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Very much agree nothing is only or just, especially anxiety. I suppose if it was JUST adrenalin it wouldn't have such a huge impact. I think if we're lucky we can eventually master it in our own way, kind of find our own salvation .
The last 12 months have certainly given me a huge insight into how difficult it must be for those who have suffered with anxiety for most of their adult lives.
For those of us who can relate it to our hormones, at least we have the memory of normality and the hope of its return when things settle for us. For that I am truly thankful.
Gosh, after sitting reading over these posts I feel low, sorry for myself and sorry for everyone else in menohell. This won't do...
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Hi H&S
Lots of good advice already but just to say that I'd agree with the suggestion to try having some hypnotherapy, especially if you can find a therapist also trained in in NLP; that's how I learnt the wonderful 321 exercise. I still listen to the cd she recorded for me every night in bed and it really does help me to relax and get to sleep. Not everyone is suitable for hypnotherapy but it's definitely worth a try.
Bette x
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I haven't suffered anxiety as such but I did have a terrible fear of flying when I was younger - had to be dragged from the house to the car to travel to the airport! I took diazepam for flights but my GP wasn't prepared to prescribe this every time I flew, so I ended up trying hypnotherapy (four sessions). It has been a godsend. My therapist taught me self-hypnosis, so now if I get anxious during a flight (bad turbulence can set me off) I use the technique and relax myself. I'm now happy to fly all over the place.
There will be something out there that can help, but unfortunately it takes a bit of trial and error. Keep looking - you'll find the thing that works for you.
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Like Anne, I too had a terrible fear of flying suffering crippling anxiety before I had to fly. It finally got to the point when I couldn't fly. Then my husband and I got the opportunity to take an expenses paid trip to San Francisco, a city I'd always wanted to visit, so I knew I had to do something about my anxiety about flying. I decided on hypnotherapy. My first attempt was a disaster; I picked a therapist out of the Yellow Pages and she was barking mad. I knew she would never be able to help me as she was totally bonkers. A friend then told me about a work colleague of hers who was a doctor who had also trained in hypnotherapy so I had 3 sessions with him where he taught me self hypnosis, it was really just a relaxation technique rather than hypnosis. I made my flight to and from San Francisco, my husband couldn't believe how calm I was. Since then I have flown many times including going to Australia.
I don't enjoy flying and I'd rather not do it but at least now I can fly without being a gibbering wreck. I have also bought a Fear of Flying CD which uses the same relaxation technique and I listen to that before I fly and on the plane for as long as I can use the mp3 player before take off. I've listened to the CD so often now that as soon as I hear the therapist's voice I start to relax, it's a Pavlovian response nowl. Hypnotherapy has made a huge difference to me and I use the relaxation technique in other areas of my life if I find myself getting wound up and stressed.
It is important to find the right therapist though. If I'd stuck with the first therapist I saw I feel sure I would never have got on the plane to the US.
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Just a comment that it seems tragic that the upheaval of menopause and what I put down to hormones can cause us all of this panic and anxiety. I would put most of it with many women down to the hormones doing what they do to our brains. Why are we ruled like this so that we get so anxious and it stops us doing what we really want to. Mind over matter is easier said than done. Let's congratulate ourselves though for trying to overcome body chemistry.
Meg
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I'll join you on that one Meg.
Before I was a calm, take it as it happens person.
Now I get anxious about anything and restricted by rubbish thoughts.
Some days I overcome others I don't do so well.
Over all I like to think I'm winning.
Flying is one thing I use to do but now the thought freezes me.
One thing I have noticed that having holidays in the UK I seen how lovely parts of our land is. ... now if we could have seasons instead of 'weather' things would be ideal 8)
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We have a beautiful country, some of the oldest history in the World with scenery to go with it! However, the weather ::)
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There is no such a thing as bad weather...............
Just inappropriate clothing.
;D ;D
Honeyb
x
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unless there's a hole in the wellie :D
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Well can you believe it - I've only gone and booked it! The last few days have been really difficult - wanting to book it and being terrified at the same time. I have had the holiday up on the pc so many times and today it just felt right so I did it. Now it's done I feel really excited! I am sure over the next six weeks I will go through lots of anxiety attacks about it but I've got you guys to help me through it. Am defo going to get hypno and am researching therapists as we speak!
Woo hoo - am off to Corfu! Xxx
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Well Done! Yep you will get anxious, me I would rather someone handed me a ticket in the morning and said go now ;D
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:congrats: H&S! 8)
Bette x
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Great news H&S. So pleased for you. One foot in front of the other.
Fx
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well done H&S. We're here to encourage you. You go girl :clapping:(http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRHsibtR4-49FujA10N1sDxATUET5OTvjGjyQl32ktCccxHrvrw3g)
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Sunshine here you come , well done !
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Cant believe how excited I feel - the pictures you have posted are fab! Thank you so much. Xx
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Great news H&S. So hard to press that button...I know. I have been worrying over our forthcoming holiday too.
Have I booked the flights correctly, right dates, right airports?
Have I booked the hire car correctly?
Last night it was booking the Meet & Greet car parking.
How much time to allow for getting to the airport
Will the Meet & Greet guy be there?
Will we find the right gate number in time?
Will we find the car hire place OK?
Will everyone at home be OK while we are away?
And then the same thing all over again on the way back ::)
Why can't I just stop worrying :-\
ariadne xx
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Well done H&S.
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Well don H&S :)
I have found the best bit about being older and the children all being grown up is that I no longer have to go away at all if I don't want to. The stress of having to do it because they all needed a break was very difficult and I spent lots of holidays counting the nights until it was time to go home, much like a lot of us on here, and then being really annoyed with myself once we were home that I hadn't enjoyed it. Now I go on my own when and if I want to (only in the UK though) I am much more relaxed as the only person who will be let down if I am ill, have an accident, make a fool of myself is.. me!
Taz x
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Mrs P - if he can be encouraged to go on his own it will give him something fresh to talk with you about. ......... Himself won't go alone though ::)
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So you need not worry as much that he is thinking he would rather be elsewhere ;). Mine loves me too, married to the same Guy are we? Even on visits to his family we went as a two-some ............ :-* however ill I was with anxiety somehow I got through even though I wished sometimes he would go alone ...........
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Brilliant news H&S! AT least you recognise you're going to probably get anxious beforehand, at certain points but like you say- you can get on MM and look for support. :)
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Thats great new H&S really pleased you did it.
I'm like CLKD if i was told on the day that would be great, no time then to start panicking about it which i am doing now its on my mind 24/7 what ifs all the time. Daughter was hungover today so i managed to be able to talk to her about a few worries. She says i'm thinking to much ha ha as if ;D I know my daughter loves me but she and i have a difficult relationship. Thats why i talked to her while still drunk because she is nice then.
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Got an email this morning delivering my e-tickets - eek! My stomach did a big somersault - however it did settle so that's good. I was telling my friend this morning that we go away five weeks tom - she asked me how many days that was I said 36 - god that sounds closer than five weeks. Having the tiniest of wobbles today. However my girls and I are meant to be going into town this afternoon to buy a bikini - which is a joke because it's teeming down outside.
Am also wondering how old is too old to wear a bikini - I will be 46 in August but am a size ten. Body is in proportion but a bit wobbly - I think because I have two stunning daughters I don't want to be seen as a mum trying to compete with her kids. Hubby says I should show off my body and be proud of it but am wondering if the time is coming where I need to be aware of my age. Anyway the resort is small enough this year that I am just going to get a bikini and go for it. Next year might be different tho. Xxx
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Hi hot and spicy , I'm your size too with wobbly bits, actually I wish there was a size 11, that would be great for me.
I'm too self conscious in a bikini now, although I don't mind one with skirt attached and high waisted. feel best in cosi though with sarong to hand. I bet you can't wait to see the sun, weather here is lousy.
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wear a bikini - when I went to Biarittz many years ago ladies of all ages wore them, or not much at all :o and some of those should have stayed indoors ;) but no one seemed to take much notice.
I am anxious and I haven't even booked the apartment :-\
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Where are you thinking of going CLKD? Xxx
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Italian Lakes Sept 2013 ;D
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Beautiful! Went to lake Garda a few years ago and it was stunning. Take your time with the planning so that you get it right for your anxiety. Sounds fab tho. Xxx
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Italian lakes sounds lovely - never been :(
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I went to Lugano aged 18 . Determined to take Himself to show him what I've been babbling on about all these years ;) but oh the anxiety surges >:(
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How will you travel CLKD?
Taz x
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Clkd the anxiety surges are a nightmare, have you had anxiety before or just during menopause?
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I went to Lugano aged 18 . Determined to take Himself to show him what I've been babbling on about all these years ;) but oh the anxiety surges >:(
CLKD - we may have discussed this in the past .... have you tried relaxation recordings when you're travelling? Really helped me a lot in March.
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Hot&spicy what about a tankie sorry not spelt that right, i was just looking at some, but you are slim so might as well go for a bikini while you can lol. I could'nt now my boobs touch the floor without a bra on ha ha
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What is it with the changing rooms in the shops?? I know I have wobbly bits I can see them in my mirror at home - but my god been trying stuff on today and my bits looked way worse than they do at home - I will be sunbathing in a black bag at this rate - very demoralised tonight. Xxx
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Wobbly bits always look better with a tan ;)
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Those mirrors in changing rooms are designed with young 'uns in mind ;)
I went to Lugano aged 18 by train. We plan to drive down taking a few days there and back with 2 weeks in a self catering appt.. Anxiety has been with me since aged 3 when I had my first attack :-\
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OMG CLKD. I cannot imagine what it would have been like to have had nxiety attack at age 3 - and since. What a struggle it must have been to live with them and to overcome them to enjoy life.
Fx
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CLKD sorry you have had to endure anxiety for, well, practically all your life. At what point did you get the beta blockers, do you find them really helpful? School, teenage years, what a struggle, I would imagine meno made it worse. :hug:
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New thread I think ;) - but not tonight, too tired ::)
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Anxiety is up and I haven't even booked the apartment yet >:(
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we are having to go away at the weekend and for the first time in about 3 years I'm highly anxious about it, waking in the early hours, dreaming a lot: this morning I felt bad even my thighs were surging with adrenaline :-\
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Hi CLKD. Isn't it sad that you cannot look forward in excitement to the weekend but have to wade through the anxiety.
I don't know how you manage the anxiety levels to cope but I was given some methods which included eating the elephant bit by bit. Taking each part of it and identifying the fear/anxiety factors, worst case scenario, likelihood, coping mechanism. And then, switching it for 'how I would like to be looking forward to it'.
Having said all of that, if you have been suffering since the age of 3, you no doubt will have had all the coping ideas in the world put to you.
Someone once said "there is nothing scarier than the fear itself". I can relate to that!
Fx
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Is it because it's a unexpected trip CLKD?
I'm ok if I plan but sometimes the unexpected can jangle my nerves
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CLKD :foryou:
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Thanks everyone. I do better if nothing is planned. Spontaneous me ::) - too much time to plan makes me nervous. I've been better for the last few years but we've had several lots of bad news, a friend-ship os on it's way out and it all adds up ........ little steps :-\
Yep, I've had every idea of coping with anxiety suggested under the :sunny: but it's a deeply learned response not conducive to CAB, relaxation therapy because it began so early. Betablockas do help.
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Hey CLKD life events do knock your confidence and make things more difficult. I usually give myself get out clauses all the way - ie I don't have to go, I can change my mind at any time, I can go a day late if need be, I can come home whenever. Somehow these tactics take the pressure off me - I cannot however use them to go to Corfu - eek!
Small steps and gently does it - you can come home at any time and it won't be a failure because at least you will have tried. And if you don't get away in the first place you will have listened to the part of you that knows its too hard just now - and if you go and it's a success you will be chuffed to bits. Xxx
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Well said hot and spicy.
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Clkd .have a hug. You sound just like me in everything to do with anxiety. I too think that I have had it since childhood. I now can remember having anxiety in certain situations as a child. I now see my first granddaughter being the same my family say she is a lot like me. But the one lovely difference for her is that my daughter gives her loads of comfort and confidence. Something I never had.
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All I got was 'you'll be OK once you get there' which was true but it didn't help the dread prior to events >:(
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The anxiety beforehand is a really lonely scary place! No one can do that journey in our head apart from us. My hubby said something really interesting last week - he said 'you just have to go through this process before we go away - there is nothing I can say that will change how you feel cause you still have to go through it - but you always work it out for yourself and get yourself where you need to go'. Bless him but he's right - its so exhausting tho and I wish I didn't have to go through the dread before hand.
When you away CLKD and where you going? Xxx
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CLKD - I did ask recently whether you'd tried relaxation tapes when travelling? Maybe you didn't see my post. I really do sympathise because until last year I'd never had anxiety or a panic attack.
Last night I was up here on the computer and hubby was busy changing all the doorhandles on the upstairs rooms. I was absolutely fine and then heard him close this door to adjust the handle and I shot off the chair and told him he MUST open the door. It comes on that quick and what possible danger could happen in my own house and with my own hubby? But there we are, that was enough to panic me. :'(
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I don't think I saw the question PennyFarthing, sorry :-\ and yep I've tried relaxation tapes, talking therapy, deep breathing, eating, not eating, kicking myself, not kicking myself ......... but when it strikes, I have to flee ........
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No worries. Just thought I'd mention it.
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:thankyou: every suggestion helps, it might steer me in a direction not yet tried ;). However, ::)
More positive tonight but then, it's the evening :P
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Hi Hot and Spicy. How are things going with your Corfu holiday plans? When do you go? Not sure if you already posted that? Having a rare glimpse of the sun this week, I amb so in the mood for a couple of weeks in the sunshine.
Hope all going well.
Fx
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Hey firewalker I head off on the 22nd - four weeks on fri - eek! I think I am still pretty excited about it and have started sunning myself in the garden so I don't look like a milk bottle on the beach! I am struggling tho cause I am finding it difficult to go out on my own just now (think this is a bad week as I have pmt!) so I don't understand how I think I will manage Corfu - there seems to be no logic to my insanity!
However yesterday I bought two tops - still no bikini so far but I am persevering to find one. Still jogging in the hope a miracle will happen and my wobbly bits will be more toned - not that optimistic but am defo a try-er!
The sun here has defo made a difference the last few days hasn't it? Thanks for asking. No doubt the jitters will rear their ugly head soon enough. Xx
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Susan's right H&S, there will be other women there who have far more wobbly bits than you do, get that bikini and enjoy :)
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By-pass the bikini and go naked 8) ;)
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My teenage kids would die!! However I could threaten them with it ;D xxx
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:rofl:
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By-pass the bikini and go naked 8) ;)
Works for me :) And stopsanyone wanting to come on holiday with us ;)
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Well if i am right its a week tomorrow for till we go. I keep having anxiety when i think about it but i really want to go so heres hopeing that i do.
Hot&spicy Thinking of you i know how you feel. Been trying to get a bit of sun on me too, though you have much more of a chance of the sun than me, knowing my luck this brief spell of sunshine will break just as we go. ::)
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a week tomorrow I go away too and I'm dreading it. 12 hour flight (to South Africa), then to stay with OH's family who are always fighting. OH is exhausted from 14+ hour days prior to leaving, to get some report finished for work, then he will go straight into that. Last thing he needs but we need to see his elderly dad.
Then we go to stay with my brother and have loads of admin to do for a week down in Cape Town.
The flight's an ordeal as don't sleep a wink, but is bearable if there's a great holiday at the end of it.
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I'm only going to the Isle of wight ;D At least you know when you get there you will be fine, for me its not knowing and well if i have anxiety here its not going to suddenly go and let me have a lovely hoilday :(
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At least on the Isle of Wight the water's the same ;D
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SA beautiful Country. Would love to visit there :)
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Yes Cape Town is nice, although will be winter and rainy. But where OH's family live is a mining area with choking coal fumes. Can't even go for a walk. Not on the tourist trail!
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We are off to Spain on Tuesday and I'm panicking big time. Although we are going to our friends' villa again, everything to do with the travelling is different.
We usually get a lift to the airport........we are driving there
We have Meet and Greet so have to find the man who will take and park our car for the duration
We are flying from a different airport
At the other end, we are using a different car hire company and have to go to a meeting point, get on a minibus and pick up the car from a depot, then find our way from the depot back onto the motorway
And then the same in reverse coming back
Why do I insist on worrying in advance about what could go wrong. It's so pointless isn't it? What can it possibly achieve and in fact nothing might go wrong and I could have saved myself the churning stomach over the past week.
ariadne xx
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To all who are going away have a great trip
Its just the getting there thats the problem
I hate flying with a passion yet I still fly
I come from Ozz to UK every 18mnths or so and for 3 months or so before I come home Im a wreck
I have got to the point where Ive said the morning of departure Im not going needless to say I do
9 times out of 10 its just me on the plane for 24hrs and IM like a deer in headlights
But I always go I console myself with the thought that the guy flying the plane wants to get home as much as I do
Ive tried drink that just made me sick as a dog amd long haul flights lavvies are yuk after 3 hrs
Ive tried sleeping pills useless Diazapam I took 10mg Valium once and I was a mess didnt know where I was
Or doing there I started crying PLANES GOING TO CRASH one good thing I got put up to 1st Class not that I cared
But when you get there its fab well worth the all the panic for me its never lessened its still the same
Bobbles says its courage that gets me on the plane HE says anyone who does something they are really terrified off
Well then they are couragous I Love my Bobbles FK IM flying next year IM worried already
MY destination is a retn trip to Paris Venice Rome and Home to Wallasey cant wait but Im still scared 16months out :'(
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Thank you for that post suziq could you try lower dose diazipam. I have 2mg and at least then you could take more if you needed to.
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Think I had better give up this guessing game when I am going on holiday as we are not going next Friday. Apart of me though wanted to go I just want to go now even more so while we have the nice weather. The seaside is the place to be in this heat.
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Sorry to hear you've had a change of plan pj but hope you get there soon. My son is popping over to the IOW tomorrow morning as he's helping a friend to move house.
Taz x
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I only have myself to blame taz. I could ask daughter and I would then know for certain but think its better for me not to know when we are going.
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Pj caught up now - u still going but don't know when. :)
Suzi q , I'm like you, hate flying but love arriving so much that I try to grin and bear it. Theres a good (famous bloke - hypnotherapist) cd available , it's helpful , explains a plane crash possibility as likely as getting kicked to death by a donkey on the way to work, sounds daft but I think of it when those engines rev up, I loathe the take off .
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Home : :great:
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Why do I insist on worrying in advance about what could go wrong. It's so pointless isn't it? What can it possibly achieve and in fact nothing might go wrong and I could have saved myself the churning stomach over the past week.
Well said Ariadne :clapping:
For all of you who have holidays booked and are overcoming your anxiety to go - well done!
For those of you thinking of booking but feeling so anxious you have not made the move yet - I hope you can find a way to manage your anxiety enough to take the step to book, to go, and to have a great time.
Fx
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Hello clkd , hope all went well for you.
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Pj caught up now - u still going but don't know when. :)
Suzi q , I'm like you, hate flying but love arriving so much that I try to grin and bear it. Theres a good (famous bloke - hypnotherapist) cd available , it's helpful , explains a plane crash possibility as likely as getting kicked to death by a donkey on the way to work, sounds daft but I think of it when those engines rev up, I loathe the take off .
To me lightening does and can strike twice
Bobbles parents died in a Plane Crash 1967 some may remember it? (he was 12)
There were 2 plane crashes that day from Manchester to Spain
Sunday 12.15am 3rd June Bobbles parents plane crashed in to the Pyrennes on their first package holiday
Theyd always gone to Spain by Boat and Train but thier daughter married year before and flew to Spain on honeymoon 4 parents flew together Bobbles and his sisters Mum and Dad her new hubbies parents so they all lost a MUM and DAD
In the 60s everything and anything was being put in the skies that could still fly they flew on a DC 4
Bobbles MUM and DAD served in the RAF the entire war (he was a change baby) first plane they flew on and it crashed
There was a carbon monoxide leak in the Cabin @flight deck theres a memorial on the mountains to them all 85 died
That afternoon the most known one it was the Stockport crash plane took off just fell out of the sky on to the fields
You can understand my fears I know silly I ride a Motor Bike Im 30 times more likely to die on that than in a car !Daft!
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Oh Suzi. How horrible. You are the first person I have 'known' who has direct link to someone who did in an aircrash.
Like you say, I think there are far greater risks we take every day but we cannot always rationalise our fears just work our way through them step by step.
Fx
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I am always really pleased to see that my son's flight has landed after his frequent trips to Florida but he always says that the journey home via M25 and M4 is by far the most dangerous part of his trip!
Taz x
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Suzi q, I can understand the fears worse if you know people who have lost their lives in plane crash, and I suppose every time there is an accident the news stories are horribly graphic and we hold that image . if your like me and you hate it but do it anyway your doing ok I suppose. They do run fear of flying courses but i can't imagine it solving anything for me I just kind of grin and bear it.
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Thanks ladies
No as the years have gone on its got worse I used to fly OK
Then it got a bit scarey bump wise but othe than that OK
Now at 58 in JUne 16 rtn trips to UK from ozz plus flights to Bali New Zealand and with in Ozz IM bloody scared wittless
BUTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT I do it that takes guts and Im no a whimp xxxxxxxxxxx to all us scaredy cats :-* :-* :-*
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The bikini is bought!! I have been reassured by many that I don't look ridiculous and that my body is fine. I never told my hubby that I had bought one and just put it on and walked into the living room with it on - his eyes lit up which was good - at least he didn't retch! He told me I looked 'hot!'. Hair is dyed and slowly but surely I seem to be getting ready to go on holiday. Still need to book the insurance, the car into the airport parking and get my euros - then it is just the wait... three weeks on friday - eek! xxx
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Oh Suzi. How horrible. You are the first person I have 'known' who has direct link to someone who did in an aircrash.
Like you say, I think there are far greater risks we take every day but we cannot always rationalise our fears just work our way through them step by step.
Fx
That just shows that 99.9% of planes dont crash or wed all know someone or know some who knew someone
Its irrational and daft when you think of Bobbles and mys hobby BIG MOTOR BIKES FAST FAST FAST
Its a normal fear most are nervy about flying even if its just take off or landing
For me its the entire thing heheh I have to laugh or Id never go anywhere yet the odd thing is
I dont worry when Bobbles son or Dinlaw flys I dont even think of it???????
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You have found a great way to manage the anxiety Suzi.
When I was a teenager I loved going on the back of fast motorbikes and yet now I just will not go on one and I get anxious even watching people driving them in corners. However, I had a friend killed on one and others badly injured. My OH has a fast bike and I will not go on it. He has had many accidents over the years although not for many years. I would rather fly around the world!
On the other hand, my daughter and I both enjoy driving powerful or fast cars. Yet, I cannot be in a car driven fast around corners by someone else because I had a very bad accident when I was 28 and fractured my spine and it feels as real today as it did then.
I guess it's 'horses for courses' and we all deal with our own anxieties in our own way.
HOT AND SPICY - I believe you look hot and I don't even know you. So pleased you are moving along the journey towards the fantastic holiday - warm, relaxing sunshine away from this mad and changeable weather we are having here. Have a fantastic time. Go by another bikini - so you can change and get the same reaction again! In fact, buy a bikini for every day and match them with lovely sheer sarongs - your hubby will be watching every day for the new fashion show lol lol. XX
Fx
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You give me too much credit FIRE IM dreadfully scared but thank you
My 16 year old cousin died she came off the back of a Motor bike in 1978
So you can imagine my familys feelings at the thought of me being on one
I have to post on Facebook every Sunday night as they know I ride every Sunday so they know IM ok!
Gosh you have been unlucky and your poor pals who died was it that that stopped you?
I hate cars Ive had 3 car crashes the middle one they had to cut me out not one scratch I still ride in them though!
My kneclace emebeded its self in my kneck via the pressure of the seat belt that was painful trying to get that out
It sounds Fire like you dont like not being in control yes?
I have no choice I dont drive oe ride except a BYcycle hehehehe
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Give me 4 wheels every time. I've been on a motor bike twice in my life and that's enough for me. Big car crash only once and it wasn't me who was driving. Still have the sore back from that one.
Good for you with bikini H&S! I've never ever felt comfortable in them, not even when I was slim enough to wear one. ::) Tried a tankini 10 years ago on holiday, but didn't like that either. One piece suits all the way for me.
For those of you flying, you are more likely to crash in your car than in a plane. I used to get very nervous on long haul flights, in fact the first one we did I spent most of the time before I got on the plane in the toilet!!! Now it doesn't bother me.
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We have a 3 hour drive on Saturday to the seaside...i will be in the back with the dog....am stressing incase i need the loo....
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Won't the driver stop Stumpy? How about a Shee-wee ........... ;) - you could always say that the dog needed a comfort break!
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Yes he will stop CLKD.....thing is i want to 'go' when i cant if you understand...
Stumpy xx
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I never used to be like this when travelling....i know as soon as we get off our drive I will get the urge. Ive even asked to take me back home before now just as we are nearing the M6 so i can go....not a popular lady on those occasions.
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i shall practice from now Mrs P ::)...thanks
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I've just read all 9 pages of this and it has given me the courage to go off and book a holiday! Only 3 days and on my own ................but..........onwards and upwards.
Bramble
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We are off on Saturday for a week. Not really very far at all...a couple of hours drive north. I have not got a clue why I am anxious about it but I have been jittery all week. I think that the last holiday we had was such a nightmare (daughter had the worst case of chicken pox) that I now worry something similar will happen. OH has not got a clue that I am wound up.
I just feel a bit feeble to be honest. I used to be able to jump in a car or a plane or train and enjoy the journey. Now the whole thought is just an ordeal. My adventurous spirit has got up and gone.
Where has that woman gone and could she please come back soon....preferably before Saturday ::)
Honeyb
x
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Oh I know ............ the moment I see the motorway I want to 'go' and I HATE going into those service areas: why can't they put loos at the outside rather than having everyone traipsing through the food halls etc., I know it's a sales ploy but those who want to buy will do so anyway.
Having to queue for a wee if a load of coaches are there, worrying about everyone else :'( and feeling more and more queasy ....... whereas loos on the outside makes it so much quicker and more relaxed. It's awful dragging a queasy child through all that food smells etc.. :-X
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HB once you get in the car and get going I'm sure you will be fine. You're not going far and you can always stop off if necessary. Coffee break or a lunch break - all part of your holiday.
I'm usually the one who is ill on holiday and it hasn't stopped me yet.............
Have a great time and try to relax and enjoy it. :)
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Off to Spain on Saturday :) Not anxious as such but I have been waking ridiculously early this week with a million and one things whirring through my brain of stuff to do before we go..... ::)
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Enjoy!
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Well i'm back not sure that anyone has missed me lol.
Went last friday totally shocked as daughter had told me we were most certainly not going then, because i had mentioned to her that i was getting myself all silly because i was sure we were going on the friday the 1st june, so when i woke up and saw that text i had an hour to walk to dog and run around getting last things done, my bag wa salready mostly packed anyway. I'm so glab she did like that as i'm sure i would never had gone.
Only had to have one 2mg diazpamon the way and none on the way back cannot believe that i have done it. weather was totally crap so that got me down and shareing room 2 grandchildren and a house with 9 all together was a challange but its been done and no major fallings out just a few cross words and that was mostly due to lack of sleep and rubbish weather.
I did so many things and went all over the island with hardly any anxiety, now i am back i feel very low want to go back and live there lol its such a lovely clean nice place and oh how i love the sound of the sea. Back to crappy dirty brum sorry but thats how it is here. Its made me realise that there is a better life out there for me if only i had the money.
Another things as well i had no phone signal, the company i am with is not much good over there so i could not ring or use internet i really thought that would send me over the edge but it never and thats a first for me, i always have to have my phone with me all the time. I'm so glab i did it.
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It was worth the travelling to see Little Jack at the beach for the first time..he loved it!!!
Have tried to post a photo of him on the beach but cant do it!!! :-\
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Same for me stumpy, my dog connor loved it. Everyone said what a lovely well behaved dog he was.
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Well done on going, staying and getting home !
I'm anxious and we haven't booked anything in Italy yet, so much so that I think I will shelve the idea :-\
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Pj44 f a b u l o u s you did it xxxx
Clkd - go on, book something, the weather is awful here, you have your beta blockers and just make sure you have nice relaxing bath every evening whilst away ;)
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pj44 - well done, that is brilliant! :congrats: :medal:
Bette x
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Same for me stumpy, my dog connor loved it. Everyone said what a lovely well behaved dog he was.
Well done pj44 - so glad to hear you had a great time and that you overcame your anxiety. I was interested reading about your phone. I actually think the darned things make some people even more anxious! I have a friend whose family never give her a minutes peace (despite them all being adults now) and she's like a cat on hot bricks all the time - they're either ringing or texting and she can never relax. It's never anything that can't wait they just like her to be at their beck and call. It drives me mad. I always turn my phone off when I'm out - we all need some "me time".
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Good for you pj44! :medal:
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Thanks everyone for kind words, CLKD if i can do it you can :P book it
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Well we did not go far...about 2/34 hours in the car and I managed and I enjoyed it. The weather for Scotland was really quite good. I got a bit wet once and that was it...never wore a jacket all week.
Only had one major wobble in a whiskey distillery. My OH wanted to do a tour and when we actually got into the distillery it was hot (very) and noisy and smelly I started to feel funny. Just too hot and light headed. I had to ask to be directed to an exit, and ended up outside shaking like a leaf. Felt a bit of a prat but still glad to be outside in the fresh air. Some things we did were a challenge but I got on and did and enjoyed.
This is the women who could go anywhere and do anything not so many years ago. I hope she comes back soon but until then I will keep on pushing and trying.
If I can do then anyone can...and just for the views...the peace and the rest it was wonderful.
Honeyb
x
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Ok the anxiety has kicked in big time. I am freaking about everything but really I think it is because the holiday is looming. I am trying really hard to calm down but not having any luck whatsoever. I also think my big panic attack last week really knocked me for six. At this point in time I can't see me getting on the plane - prob end up locked up somewhere while my family jet off on hols. Doesn't help that this is my pmt time which is always a rough week so am guessing everything is out of perspective. Eek! Xxx
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How does the anxiety affect you?
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Shaking, trembling, jittery tummy, jittery legs, feel dizzy, feel faint, feel like I am going to die, feel like I am going mad - and that was just this morning! Managed to get out the door tho to meet my ex boss for lunch - am pleased to say the anxiety has lessened a bit now and am chuffed I managed it. We had a mega blether and lovely food so all was good. God I hate it when the anxiety is this high.
Forgot to say - well done to pj for getting away on holiday - sounds like you did an amazing job - you have set the bar high! Xxx
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Well done you for going out to lunch and enjoying it, H&S. :congrats: Try to focus on that rather than how you felt this morning. Even as I type that, I'm thinking that's it's so easy to say it but so hard to do. :-\ I really do understand that. :bighug:
Bette x
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That's what the Psycholgoist used to tell me Bette, remember how you felt on a good day >:( but it don't work like that :'(
Botheration :cuss:
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Hot@spicy. Thank you. I truely feel for you. Before I went I was having this tickle feeling in my throat and I kept coughing I have that when my anxiety is very bad. Now I have been and come back it has gone. I only went becau se my daughter had told me we were not going on the day that I had told her I thought we were going. Can you take the diazpam that really helped me. And lots of rescue remedy.
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Seems that many people suffer with anxiety in the way that it gets me >:( .......... it's the nausea which floors me :'(
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ok its the final countdown and boy are the jitters kicking in. Sometimes I get utterly overwhelmed with fear during the day as I cannot imagine me getting on the plane on Friday - other times I am so excited I am out shopping and getting sun tan cream etc... It doesn't help that since last Friday I have had a really upset tummy - thankfully this morning it has gone - it feels nice to have my tummy back to normal. Having an upset tummy was making me more anxious as I didn't want to go away unwell.
Not had any luck trying to get a hypnotherapist. Tried 4 different people and so far NONE have got back to me. I chased one woman up who seemed really nice on her website but in reality was a bit nippy - telling me she was far to busy to see me this month! Its a shame her website never matched how she was on the phone as I wouldn't have phoned her. Emailed another a week past sunday - got an automated response saying they would be in touch soon. Phoned two days later and got an answering machine message - left a really nice message but no luck - still no reply - the other two i can't even be bothered chasing up now. God are hypnotherapists so busy that they don't need the business? Anyway this is one anxious lady that could do with some techniques to settle the nerves.
Eeek - my biggest fear still is that I am going to freak out at the airport. I am not scared of the holiday just how I will be before i go. Also starting to get a weird sore head (PMT) due my period the day I go - happy days so the chances of me having a migraine are phenomenal - maybe I will be in so much pain with my migraine that I won't be able to panic - oh god I need to stop typing I am getting my knickers in a twist thinking about it - right off to find some distraction! xxx
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Rescue Remedy, pain relief for the headache before it starts, dry biscuits to settle that tum ....... been there many times :-\ and it's only when I get home into my own bed that I know if I've had a good time or not: what a way to live :'(
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Oh I really do feel for you. Get the rescue remedy down you now. I also got the sweets and sucked on them. Keep telling yourself no matter how bad I feel I am going. X
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Hot and spicy, I would feel exactly the same as you if going abroad imminently, I would also be excited to be going as well. You have accepted your going to be panicky on travel day - so, make yourself a panick help list, write down everything you have to help ease it - beta blockers, rescue remedy, the 3 2 1 exercise, mints to suck etc etc. your journey is very small part of your holiday and once you are there you will slowly settle. Break journey up into segments packing - tick , journey to airport , airport time - shop to distract, keep ticking everything off mentally that you achieve. Remind yourself , normal to feel like this at mo as hormones out of whack you WILL cope and soon you'll be lapping up the sunshine despite pesky hormones. :sunny:
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When I'm going on holiday I pack weeks ahead so that if I am over-taken by anxiety at least I know must stuff is ready :-\
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Hi H&S
I know how you feel after my recent plane journey but i did it and you will too. I didn't go through the security gates until I absolutley had to. I took rescue remedy before i went through and chewed gum which helped me distract myself. I then went to the shops and had a browse and kept reminding myself of who i really am and that this is the Bxxxxy hormones. At the departure gates I started talking to someone and kept myself engaged in conversation until I had to board the plane.
Hope that helps in some way and i will have to remind myself when we go away on the 2nd July :-\ :-\
Macxxx
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Hot & Spicy - where are you going on holiday? I am pretty sure I replied to somebody about flying (maybe a few months ago). I have had PTSD the last year and get really bad attacks of panic and anxiety but made it to Tenerife (and back! :)) with DD in March.
I recommended relaxation tapes to listen to on plane, a good book, Rescue Remedy, sipping water and an aisle seat.
Because of what happened to me prior to my PTSD I have a fear of being in a situation I can't control and also of being confined. Even today I used a Park & Ride bus and get panicky if I am not first off the bus. I cannot cope at all with people blocking the aisle.
It is a horrible, horrible feeling so I totally sympathise with you but I think you'll be fine. We'll all be on a psychic link with you I'm sure and if we can do it so can you. Have a lovely time. :)
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Thanks ladies for all your wonderful advice. In my hand luggage I have beta blockers, diazepam, bachs rescue remedy, chewing gum, sweets, an iPod and trashy mags - these are my distractions for the flight. I am not going to wait till I am freaking before I take a diazepam. I will take one the night before and one when I get up. I think I am mostly excited. However today I have the obligatory migraine that goes with my pmt - just need to find a way to gently get through the day. Did a lot of the running about stuff yesterday. Oh and my tummy was all better yesterday so must have been a bug. Wish you could all come with me! Xxx
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We'll see you at the airport on Friday then ;)
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Hot and spicy your ready to go and your hand luggage sounds just like mine ! I'm starting to look at hols abroad now, I really fancy blue skies for a week and my anxiety and pesky hormones will just have to come too. ;)
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Have a good holiday H&S. Sounds like you're all organised.
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Hi, I have just been on holiday, and for a week before i was quite anxious but really wanted to get away. The first night there i didnt sleep but was so tired and stressed with the journey and was quite anxious but then took my meds and was ok for the rest of the week, i really had a good time after that. I am on seraquel lowest dose possible which is great for severe anxiety.
Charliegirl.
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Hi H&S
Hope all goes well tomorrow and that you have a great holiday.
Mac
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Thanks everyone - I am peeing my pants! Doesn't help that I have had a two day migraine and my period started this morning. Hopefully I manage to sleep tonight and I get through it tom somehow - eek. Plane takes off at 8.30 am so need to be at airport for 6.30 am. Hubby has told me that he could fire lift me on to the plane - ie throw me over his shoulders! I am sure once there we will have a fab time. Xxx
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Hot and spicy - enjoy your holiday in the sunshine x this time tomorrow you'll be sooooo happy x
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Hopefully the migraine will go now period has started? You can do it. Will you be able to message us while u are away. Just think you will be in the lovely sunshine and we are stuck with the rain.
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Not sure if you will get this message before you go on holiday H&S.
I hope you manage to relax and enjoy each part of the holiday - step by step.
Come back and tell us all about your fabulous holiday :-).
Fx
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Anybody know where Hot & Spicy is going to?
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I think it's Corfu. It's on the first page of the Holiday Anxiety thread.
Taz x
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Kalimera from Corfu! Just come off the beach for a little refreshment and the pool bar has free wi-fi - thought I would tap into the world to see what's happening! Isn't technology amazing - iPhones wifi etc .. Means I can say hello from far far away. Well I made it here that's for sure and I had no anxiety whatsoever! I took a diazepam the night before I left but when I got up the morning of the flight I felt fine so never bothered with another one. The journey to the airport was easy, the airport was a bit tense but we were all tense so it was nothing to do with 'me' personally and the flight was a joy. The week here has been scorching and it is so pretty where we are. I have not felt anxious at all this week which has been fab - reminded me what life should be like. I feel rested, content and not quite ready to come home tomorrow. I have had the odd moment of feeling a bit emotional but that is when I see my wonderful family around me having fun in the sun in a beautiful setting. Anyway just wanted to drop in and say hi - no doubt you will all need to pick me up next week when I am back to reality back home! Xxx
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Aw, glad you're having a good time H&S - enjoy your last day :)
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Wow, that is brilliant, H&S, well done you! :congrats: Have a good journey tomorrow - better prepare yourself for slightly different weather! 8) ;D
Bette x
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Well done you H&S. Get a brolly on your way home, you're going to need it! Meantime enjoy your last day of sunshine.
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:medal:
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Hi H&S
That's fantastic to hear. Really pleased for you. It makes me more positive about my flight on Monday :)
Macxx
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Well done :foryou:
ariadne xx
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So fantastic to read your latest news from Corfu! It has really made me feel like I could do it too!!! You're an inspiration to us all. Well done you. :)
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Really pleased for you Hot and Spicy - you're sounding great! I am waiting to hear where you stayed etc. :) I love Corfu.
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B R I L L I A N T x
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:congrats: :congrats: :congrats:
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It was fantastic to read your post about your holiday H&S. So pleased you had a great experience.
Welcome home to summer 'a la UK'.
Fx
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Well here i go ladies. About to drive to Glasgow for our flight tonight.
Wish me luck.
Mac
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I was wondering how you were hot&spicy bet your glad you went now and what was all the fuss about ;D so glab you got a break from the anxiety it really does you good.
All the best mac where you going?
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You have probably left by now, but good luck and have a fab time Mac
Fx
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Mac hope it's not a long car journey. So glad we can fly from local airport this year.
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I'm still tight across the belly even though I'm not going anywhere ::) ........... :bang: :bang: :bang:
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Well since i did so well going to the Isle of wright in June, i'm off too newquey at the end of August. Going with my daughter and her family again i must be mad but have told myself its only for, four days and staying 3 nights in a caravan so i can cope with that. Here's hopeing the weather is better than last time and i actual get to swim in the sea. I'm scared but so much more excited than last time.
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My husband and I have got the chance to go away next week, for a week, just the two of us but I'm too scared to book the flight abroad, just in case my anxiety rockets and I can't get on the plane! I feel ok to holiday in Britain now, but would love to go abroad again....any advice ladies?? :)
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Thats a hard one for me to answer 2catsnat as i'm just not sure if i could go abroad and i have to decide soon as my daughter will be booking to go abroad next year and she has asked if i want to go. All i will say if you have read the past posts from hot&spicy and she did it then i am sure that you can, she was a mess before she went.
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Hi 2catsnat. What a great shame you feel so anxious about it.
I just wondered if you have you ever booked, and then never been able to get on the plane?
This thread was great for support and ideas for Hot&spicy whose fear was greater than the reality - and we all cheered with her when she had a fabulous time.
Please take the time to read through the thread - I think you will take comfort, hope and ideas from it.
Fx
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I would agree with the others - lots of great advice and support here. If I can do it anyone can. I was soooo nervous leading up to it - took loads of drugs with me to the airport - diazepam, beta blockers, pain killers in case I got a migraine, bachs rescue remedy you name it but I never needed any of it. In the end I realised I was panicking about panicking and not the actual flight. I also realised if I didn't do it this year it would be even harder next year.
Well done pj - I can hear your excitement! You did really well to cope with your first holiday and now you are going your second one - that is great news! Go for it 2catsnat! Xxx
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Thanks Ladies, don't worry hot and spicy, I won't be going anwhere on holiday Uk or abroad without propanolol, herbal meds, or valium!! I soo want to give it a go but I'm feeling so dodgy again at the mo - I'm crying alot and feeling very down in the dumps in the morning....generally feeling sorry for myself (not good). I'm wondering whether now is the right time to push it???? Have just started a different HRT yesterday so wondering what that will bring over next few days...
Firewalker - I'm not a fan of flying but I've never considered alcohol or valium etc to get through it. It's always been at a level a lot of people experience I should imagine.
Last year unfortunately, when I arrived at the airport to fly home with my family, I was hungry, very stressed about something else, and extremely hot and I ended up having a massive panic attack. I calmed down enough in time to board and then the anxiety went completely. It was a few weeks after this that I fell apart completely and now realise that my perimeno symptoms were reaching a climax!
The thought of being a long way from home in a foreign country frightens me when I think of "what if I freak out and want to get home and I can't?" Crazy I know but that's meno for you!
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I totally understand where you are coming from 2cats (you shortened your name?) - when you feel like this it feels so hard to do anything far less go abroad. Like you my anxiety has come about after a huge panic attack at the airport a couple of years ago. It has knocked the confidence out of me ever since in terms of holidays. Maybe now is not the right time as you have just started a new hrt - it's so hard to know what to do isn't it.
Today I am meeting a friend for lunch and I almost feel too overwhelmed to do that - it's a joke isn't it - am so tired dealing with all this meni crap. Listen to your body and see what it tells you. Despite feeling really anxious about going away I always had a sense deep inside me of thinking that I could do it. Maybe your body is saying its not quite the right time for you. Let us know what you decide - you will defo get loads of support from us. Xxx
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H&S - sounds very similar to me! I hope you got out to meet your friend for lunch?? I too have got that feeling deep inside me that I can do it and everything will be ok, but the little imp on my shoulder keeps saying maybe it wont be ok.............
Randomly, today I went in a flight simulator with my daughter and I was absolutely fine (it was mocked up like getting on a 747 and inside too) so I was pretty chuffed with my reaction. There is hope for me yet!
Good idea Susan about it being a mini break instead - I'm going to talk about that with my husband tonight.
And THANK YOU for being so supportive - when I read your comments before going out this afternoon, I felt so good to know MM friends would be there for me :foryou: :thankyou:
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It is so physical. 'queasy' around the belly button = shakey legs. Weak calves and thighs. Light headed. Slight head ache. Deeply worried about eating. Worried about it continuing over-night into the morning. Unable to face food/drink. Then of course Himself prods me about 'must eat' - I KNOW :bang: ……….
As the anxiety wears off I wee - every 10 mins. for about 3 hours and a LOT each time :-\ …………… and on an ordinary day when I'm eating I often think "I wouldn't be able to face this when anxious" …….
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It's only one night CLKD and you have been great before.
Just little nibbles of things you know you can stomach. How about one of your emergency meds,nor do they make you too sleepy.
I must take my own advice. We are away soon and I always get uptight. Kids are coming at the end of the week and my son wants to take us out for a meal....that just makes me panic ::)
Honeybun
X
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:thankyou:
Oh that sets me off as well. Having to book a meal out …….. we are also meeting up with friends 2-morrow evening :-X
The emergency medication knocks me out cold within 10 mins. for about 4 hours. At least it gives me relief but I had lots to do this afternoon so I kept Pressing On ………
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Well done you for pressing on Super Trooper :medal:
When I get anxious and all the crap that goes with it I find it impossible to function at all !
What is your emergency medication, can anyone get it ? ;)
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Nope - it's on Prescription only and begins with an 'L' ………. but can't remember the Very Long Name. A friend drinks lager to 'get through' but I've never gone into the alcohol route. Could bring along other problems.
Now I've got another ear-worm …… souper trouper da da da :D ::)
I did think around 2.30 that I was going to collapse in a heap. Legs went weak, head began to whizz with despair ……. so I ate another Dextrose tablet …..
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Also if they are good friends they will understand how you might be feeling and won't be expecting anything of you so should be less stressful maybe :-\ x
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I must remember that thought and let them do all the talking ;). We can walk from the camper to the pub. quite easily although the lane is very dark.
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Any excuse to hold on tight to hubby eh ! ;D
Yes let them rabbit on and stick on an inane smile :rofl:
Sure you be ok once there ,imagine all snuggly in the camper and all the interesting things you might find on your rummaging. X
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:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Just 're read that it didn't quite come out right :-\
You know what I meant though I hope x
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Many many years ago...my first Saturday job I worked for a very nice man....him and his wife ended up with five sons. I was only 13 when I started my job and I ended up like one of the family. They had a holiday caravan in Dunoon. I vividly remember the older of the sons telling me they did not like the van at night time as it moved. Being very young I did not quite get what they were on about. A few years later it clicked....the attempt for a baby girl ;D....nope just more boys.
Just remember...it moves, and I don't mean the Earth. ;D
Honeybun
X
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Panic dispersed enough on Thursday enough to eat my evening meal. Not too bad yesterday but I sent DH around the Show Ground alone and sat in the camper. Had to resort to ememrgey meds which enabled me to eat a banana and then have a look-see ……… and haven't been too bad today.
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Welcome home CLKD :)
Glad you managed to get away and have a meal with your friends well done x
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:thankyou: I'm really tired now. Always happens after :-\
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Well feet up then and relax ;)