Menopause Matters Forum
Menopause Discussion => Personal Experiences => Topic started by: giniboz on October 06, 2011, 08:47:28 AM
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Hi fellow ladies! No doubt like me, trying to live with the misery that is the Menopause. I actually joined this site about a year ago, when the Menopause seemed to hit almost overnight - one day I was me, and then... periods started spluttering to a halt, started experiencing soaking night sweats, about 50 hot flushes a day, suddenly feeling so angry and irritable, lashing out at my poor long-suffering partner, bursting into tears over nothing... boy, I was in a bad way. I can't take HRT cos my darling mum died of breast cancer three years after starting a course of HRT and it has made me very anti, and my doctor agrees that it is NOT a good way to go. After googling madly, trying to find ANYTHING to help, I stumbled across a medical site that stated that Fluoxetine (Prozac) was good for diminishing menopausal symptoms, so I tried it. I have to say, within 7 days, all the symptoms had totally gone, and I went on a sort of crusade with my friends to urge them to try it - it was like a miracle!
Anyway, that was then. Within a few months, my periods had started again, and I realised that the 'miracle' of Prozac probably wasn't doing what I thought it was, in fact my body was probably not quite hitting the menopause proper, and at the end of 6 months or so when my periods had stopped, my symptoms returned with a vengeance. Still continued taking the Prozac, in the vain hope that they might help, and... suffice to say, I have now given up as they make absolutely no difference whatsoever. As I sit here, gently steaming, on my tenth hot flush of the morning, I have just ordered some 'Serenity' cream for £20, after reading all the blurb about how good it is. I feel so desperate, and depressed, and wonder if ANYONE can offer any advice about any other products out there I can try? (I've tried Black Cohosh, Garlic, Flash-Fighters etc.) My doctor is now talking about Beta-Blockers (sounds scary) and another anti-depressant called Tibolone (or something like that) is anyone out there using those? Sorry, this is a bit rambly, hope it all makes sense.
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I too dont take HRT and I have tried every supplement there is with little effect. The thing is with flushes they do wax and wane. I have been through periods of severe flushing and then they will subside. At the moment my flushes are fairly minimal.
My doctor is totally against HRT (maybe because they dont want to spend the money???) and she did not offer any alternatives. She views it as a natural occurence that will pass of its own accord and I just have to suck it up and get on with it.
Having said that my symptoms are flushing, night sweats, headaches and palpitations. I do not suffer with depression except for the odd blue day so Im sure your doctor can prescribe something for that.
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:welcomemm: some medications designed for one condition have been found to help others so what have you to lose?
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Hi - i dont take HRT either not cos im against it or anything like that just havent been offered it by my doctor ... im peri-meno and suffering with night sweats and sweats during the day too - not sure if these are classed as hot flushes or what ! erratic periods, weight gain, headaches, insomnia, personality change ... oh you all know the list is endless - i agree its so awful and i never really expected it to be so bad - my mum was very lucky and sailed through her "change" so i was silly enough to think the same thing may happen to me .. no such luck.
Anyway getting to the point (sorry) I am on beta blockers actually prescribed for my migraines, but i havent noticed that they have had any affect on my menopause symptoms at all im afraid, well who knows maybe they have and i would be worse if i wasnt on them :o anything is worth a try that may work for you... i think menopause is a total nightmare and i cant believe how much its changed me >:( though this forum is a god send as so many strange things i have been experiencing and worrying about are talked about here and it somehow makes it just that bit more bearable.
I hope the serenity cream works for you - let us know.
sending a big hug ... oh mind you hugs normally make my sweats worse ! still sending one anyway x
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I was given Beta Blocas for the painic but Id taken them at 26
So nothing to do with meno
I too didnt take HRT just HRT internal cream and I took the mini pill
MY GP and me too didnt want to take HRT
I know HRT vaginally is safe for cancer people try and ask but if your vaginas ok
Then there are a hoest of other antidepressants that can help must be honest I dont like the idea of Prozac myself
Chin up keep writing I do it does make you feel safer knowing your not alone xxxxx
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I was also totally against trying HRT, but after three years of trying virtually every natural remedy and still feeling awful, I am going to give it a whirl.
I can cope with the hot flushes - I suppose I get about 8-10 on a bad day and sometimes far fewer. What I just can't put up with anymore is the continual feeling of melancholy and crying at the drop of a hat, coupled with the sleep deprivation. I work full time and always feel so totally exhausted.
I just want to feel somewhere near normal again.
I am supposed to be trying Oestrogel, if the consultant ever gets around to writing to my GP about it >:(
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So sorry you are having a hard time. I can soo relate to the weepy/ depressed etc. I have been refused HRT as I am too old. :'( :'( So am having to go it alone. Sucks doesn't it?
GP gave me an anti- depressant but it just zonked me out to the point I was dangerous to drive I reckoned. Am trying Menopace at moment.
I hope you get something to help.
Keep chatting it really helps to know you are not alone :hug: to you all
Blue xx
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Hi Ginibob
I notice at the end of your post that you mention Tibolone... Well, this is another form of HRT - not quite the same as "traditional" HRT but still effective :)
My sister in law had this for a few years and found it very good - so worth a try maybe? I have no idea how this would impact upon you as regards your mother's illness - perhaps this is something you could address with your Doctor?
Hope you find your way through this - I know how hard it can be.
Valxx
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My libido is not reduced, it has packed up and emigrated :(
Just hoping that the Oestrogel will help, when I eventually get to try it out.
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THANK YOU! for all your wonderfully supportive, informative and helpful replies. It's been so good to be able to 'talk' to other women about all this, and especially thankful to the lady who wrote more about Tibolone... I must admit, I didn't know it was a sort of HRT, I thought it was just another anti-depressant, so that was incredibly useful. I might give it a try. I feel a bit like a lab-rat/guinnea pig going through all these various drugs with my doctor, who actually is enormously helpful, and is forever scouring his medical journals for other things we can try, while I'm sitting grizzling in his surgery...
I put on my first slathering of 'Serenity' cream this morning after my shower, and am expecting great things! I do feel that when you get to this stage of feeling absolutely strung out and desperate, we will try almost anything, and spend loads of money on 'miracle cures' that often are a load of rubbish... still, gotta try.
Another awful thing I find is that from going from a size 10 for most of my life, I seem to be developing love-handles, thunder-thighs and a sort of fatty tyre under my boobs that I have NEVER had before! It doesn't matter how many sit-ups I do, or walks with the dog I go on, it doesn't seem to make any difference at all - whereas pre-meno I could get rid of a few pounds with ease. This really is naffing me off, and I feel fat and unattractive... can somebody tell me anything positive at all, about this stage in our lives??
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Yep Larky right on!
As for love handles etc., it's aging sadly :'( ............ lack of oestrogen, lack of exercise, all those years of excess layered down like Hunston Cliffs >:( ............
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but why does it stick there >:( - and is it the same the World over?
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Susan, that's so interesting about the fluid retention - I had heard of weight gain with the menopause, but always assumed you could shift it by doing the right sort of exercises. I can tell my shape is changing, but have a horror of morphing into one of those ladies who just get thicker and thicker, and end up with no waist and a big tummy etc. Also my energy levels are at an all-time low, so even the thought of going and getting hot and sweaty in a gym, and then getting a massive hot flush is just so off-putting... It's so unfair as well, as I'm eating exactly the same semi-healthy stuff as I always have!
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There is a small article here http://www.talkmenopause.com/webdocs/care/weight_menopause.php. I am turning into one of those women who have lost their waists and got a thicker shape.
Taz x
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What about walking instead of going to the gym? Good exercise and not too sweaty an activity. I've never thought all that jumping up and down is good for you anyway, gently does it in my book. Didn't the man who started the craze for jogging have a heart attach out running or is that just a myth?
Jenny X
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That should say "heart attack".
J X
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He did ::) ......... and jogging is bad for the hips, knees and ankle bones! Brisk walking with others can be fun!
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I am beginning to grow a roll under my breasts >:(
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:rofl: home grown tomatos and locally raised cheese ;)
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Gynae told me that women change shape during menopause and it is the norm to put on about a stone in weight >:(
Body lays down fat because it can get small amounts of oestrogen from it and the fat goes around the middle, which is why we turn into apples. All pretty depressing really.
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I love swimming but not the changing rooms >:( .............
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THANK YOU! for all your wonderfully supportive, informative and helpful replies. It's been so good to be able to 'talk' to other women about all this, and especially thankful to the lady who wrote more about Tibolone... I must admit, I didn't know it was a sort of HRT, I thought it was just another anti-depressant, so that was incredibly useful. I might give it a try. I feel a bit like a lab-rat/guinnea pig going through all these various drugs with my doctor, who actually is enormously helpful, and is forever scouring his medical journals for other things we can try, while I'm sitting grizzling in his surgery...
I put on my first slathering of 'Serenity' cream this morning after my shower, and am expecting great things! I do feel that when you get to this stage of feeling absolutely strung out and desperate, we will try almost anything, and spend loads of money on 'miracle cures' that often are a load of rubbish... still, gotta try.
Another awful thing I find is that from going from a size 10 for most of my life, I seem to be developing love-handles, thunder-thighs and a sort of fatty tyre under my boobs that I have NEVER had before! It doesn't matter how many sit-ups I do, or walks with the dog I go on, it doesn't seem to make any difference at all - whereas pre-meno I could get rid of a few pounds with ease. This really is naffing me off, and I feel fat and unattractive... can somebody tell me anything positive at all, about this stage in our lives??
All I can think of is that after going through this living hell, we will grow as people and have strength to deal with whatever life throws at us post menopause??? Will that do for today ? ;D
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Yep sure will!
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If there is any justice we should, but I somehow doubt that ;) I am always the eternal pessimist.
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Me too, my husband once gave me a birthday card that said on the front 'Happy Birthday to a born pessimist' and inside it said 'hope your birthday is every bit as bad as you expect it to be' :o
Oh that's lovely Larky ;D
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;D ..........
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Hi again, yes, have been reading up on this weight gain associated with the menopause, and it would seem that you can fight it as much as you like, it's going to be much harder to shift than ever before! Oh the joy...!
I referred to the fact that I had bought Serenity cream off the internet, well... it ain't working. If anything, I am waking slightly MORE in the nights, dripping with sweat, and I feel like a real twit buying into all the hype on the internet... I guess it must work for some women though, or they wouldn't make it, right? Anybody had success with it out there? Or how about Wild Yam cream?
Went to the doc's yesterday and he had told me Tibolone is a bad choice for me. He got his book out (again), and looked it up, and said that the BC link is too dodgy for me to try, so.... he has put me on Beta-Blockers! Started yesterday, and he said I will know within around 10 days if it is going to make any difference i.e. ease my horrific symptoms, so here's hoping. (One thing I do find a bit difficult is the fact that he is a young, dashing 30-year old chap, and as pleasant and polite as he is, I feel that he is getting a bit tired and bored of this wild-eyed 50-year old woman turning up every fortnight like a bad penny practically begging him to give me anything that might help... might see if the practice has a female GP that I can see)
Made love with my lovely partner this morning, after a 3-week sex famine, and felt... NOTHING. Well, I felt guilty actually, as I love him very much, but just cannot get aroused!!! Went through the motions whilst making a mental shopping list in my head for Sainsbury's later on.... and we used to have the most wonderful times in bed! I feel so sad.. this is what I hadn't bargained for, this zero interest in sex.
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You made love with him - which he will appreciate. Don't tell him about the list making ;) ....... what goes on in your head is not for his ears ............. I find that if I make the approach and we get on with it, I feel OK and he gets what he needs ;) :-*
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The sex thing is rubbish isn't it >:( There was me before this Meno started thinking no period = no worries. Now I couldn't give a monkeys if we do or don't. :-\
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It really is tragic. When we first met a couple of years ago our sex life was so wonderful, and I feel sorry for him more than anything, that he now has to put up with me being so totally disinterested... I always promised him that I would never 'fake it' but I have done now, twice, and it makes me feel like a fraud and almost disloyal to him. I must say, I had never heard of this particular side effect of the meno, and never knew about yukky stuff like 'vaginal atrophy' (think that's what it's called). It makes me feel old, like I'm drying up like an old woman, and I'm frightened by that. On a brighter note, a colleague at work (who I have confided in, she's 57 and out the other side of the meno) did say that once this nightmare is over, her interest in sex was renewed, and she has a lovely sexual relationship with her partner now. That does give me hope.
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Mine never went away, so there is hope as your friend says giniboz, though sometimes I wish it had ::)
silverlady x
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MIne was always there still is I get a tingly feeling hehehe
But AV NEVER GOES it seems such a long time ago now Feb 2008 that I got that itch
xxxxxxxx
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We haven't even attempted it for about 8 months, it hurt so much last time it was a complete waste of time.
I do miss it though, after having hysterectomy it was so good not to have to think about contraception and we had quite a number of really good years, but that has gone now :'(
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:rofl:
Good job we have a sense of humour ::)
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;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
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:rofl:
Good job we have a sense of humour ::)
Well we have to or we'd be crying all the time.
On second thoughts, I do cry a lot of the time over anything and everything. Where has the normal, rational, sane person that I used to be gone?
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Hi all. I've started looking at the forum again, having been signed off work for a bit. Menopause has certainly NOT helped me cope at all with a very demanding job and my body has finally packed up with "post viral fatigue". Have you heard of Clonidine for hot flushes/night sweats? I had read about it before but avoided it due to the unending list of ghastly side effects. Took one tablet last night - I felt like I was taking a cyanide tablet! Surprisingly I didn't fall asleep in front of the TV but once in bed the usual round of sweating began. At 3 a.m. I was wide awake - far more awake than usual. One of the side effects is "difficulty sleeping" - the last thing I need. I won't take another one tonight as I need as much sleep as possible at present in order to get better. I had stupidly thought this might be a miracle cure but apparently it does help some women. Maybe I need to give it more of a chance but when is it ever a good time to test out a drug which might make you "tired", "insomniac", "nauseous" etc etc?! Most of the side effects come as standard with the menopause anyway! I have spent a small fortune on herbal remedies etc - none seem to have worked. There is a new one I've read about (Ambi ... can't remember the name at present) but it sounds really expensive. They give you a money back guarantee though. Maybe I'll try that in due course. Mrs Purple - thank you for giving me a few laughs whilst reading this thread. Menopause is an unbearable thing at times and having a giggle is so important.
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Thank you Mrs P. I will have a look at the 'funnies' section as I am in need of a laugh. It is all too easy to get dragged down the this menopause thing. :)
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I tried Clonidine, but only for a very short time as it gave me a really bad headache. It was quite good at halting the flushes but it was a weird sensation as I could still feel a flush coming on, but then it was as if someone threw a switch and turned it off before it developed!
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Hi PixieBoots. I just came across your post (im fairly new & stil havnt gotten the hang of how to post lol). Anyhow Im 43 only started hrt as been through hell last year (history of early meno in family) but i totally relate to the weight issue.....its so upsetting. Like yourself iv always been slim (8-10) & within the last year i cant fit into any of my clothes. As if the meno wasnt hard enough already!! Everyone says its part of "the change" unfortunately but i also discovered that my thyroid is extremely underactive so that has most certainly led to a bit of the weight gain & fatigue so might be worth getting your bloods checked? Im only on meds a few weeks so no change yet but defo more energy. I hope you find some relief & talking really does help! Xxx
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Hi pixieboots,
I remember reading this post back in 2011 and as it has popped up again on the forum, I wondered how things are for you now?
Happy New Year!
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I only noticed it was 2011 the original post lol.....sorry thought it was 2016....meno effecting the eyes as well obviously to add to the list ;D ;D