Menopause Matters Forum

Menopause Humour => The funny side of menopause => Topic started by: MrsMitch on April 23, 2024, 09:27:38 AM

Title: The transition is now complete
Post by: MrsMitch on April 23, 2024, 09:27:38 AM
Hoping to give you a giggle this morning,  amidst all the struggles of menopause.
I've slowly been turning into my mother, more noticeable since she's no longer here.
Now the transition is complete - a female friend was round the other day and as I walked out of the room to put the kettle on - I farted 😆😆
No idea that it was coming, no control over it. Fortunately we had a good laugh but as  my mother, grandmother and friend herself were/are prone to it, I did wonder if it would ever happen to me!!
Why do our aging bodies do things over which we had no control? What if I do it when I have to have an intimate examination next? Oh deary dear!!
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: CLKD on April 23, 2024, 11:11:29 AM
Many years ago I looked in a shop window and saw Mum  :o and she told me that I 'wouldn't see a better person' ......

It's due to laxity of muscles.  Apparently  ::)
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: jaypo on April 23, 2024, 12:43:23 PM
🤣😂😆 brilliant MrsMitch,this used to be my mum too,she'd get up to make a cuppa and all you'd hear was Parp parp parp all the way to the kitchen,she couldn't have cared less 😂
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: HellsBells on April 23, 2024, 01:06:01 PM
Oh crikey....I have to admit this has been me for the last 6-9 months it's MORTIFYING.
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: MrsMitch on April 23, 2024, 04:05:55 PM
Good to know we're all like it - in a way!
We were having a conversation with one of our customers in his garden the other day, he's quite deaf. He let rip in the middle of the conversation but couldn't hear it. Very hard to keep a straight face.
Oh well ladies,  we'll just have to embrace the wind, nothing else we can do!
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: Betsy123 on April 23, 2024, 10:16:29 PM
Love this, I to worry every time I go for a wee as a little fart will inevitably come out at the same time. Me and my kids used to laugh at my Mum and now it’s happening to me. The good old signs of aging gracefully   ;D
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: jaypo on April 24, 2024, 07:21:37 AM
Isn't it strange though that a normal bodily function that EVERYONE does,makes us so embarrassed. I say we organise a protest.....March for farts !!  ;D
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: CLKD on April 24, 2024, 10:02:01 AM
I'll fire up the charabanc, venue ?

Yet when a baby farts he's applauded  ::)
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: Lesred on April 24, 2024, 11:33:34 AM
Oh ladies can I just say you have made me properly laugh with this thread  ;D

Thank you! March for farts sent me over the edge…
 
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: jaypo on April 24, 2024, 12:09:57 PM
You're welcome  ;D ;D
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: Songbird on April 24, 2024, 06:40:38 PM
 I can't help howling with laughter when farting is involved. I don't know what it is! Toilet humour - brilliant  ;D
This isn't menopause related, I know, but......
I remember when I was a girl going out for Xmas Dinner at a pub with my brother, mum and dad. It was a split level set up. We were on the upper level. There was a table right below us. The lady's head was directly below my dad's butt and he farted!😲. The look on her face, followed by my mum's mortification sent me into hysterics  :rofl: What made me worse was that my dad was completely oblivious  ;D
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: CLKD on April 24, 2024, 07:15:03 PM
 :o. ..........  bad seating design then !

I had wind many years ago and muttered about it, DH said across the room "Well fart then" [not a word we were allowed to use] - my Mum almost collapsed with laughter and not the usual reprimand.  ;D

Where'er you be
Let it free
For the want of a fart
Was the Death of me
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: fiftyplus on April 24, 2024, 08:43:31 PM
Many years ago when I stayed at my parents, one of the neighbours was in talking to my mum, we were sat on the sofa having our dinner, she was standing right in front of us and yes you have guessed ... she farted, well she didn't even stop talking, we all heard it and couldn't look at each other   ;D

I remember in a previous job when I worked on reception, the disabled toilet was right next to my desk and I could hear everyone and I don't think they realised ... the Managing Director used to regularly use this toilet for a pee & farts but the thing was he would then come out and start chatting to me (he obviously didn't realise I could hear everything) and I had to then continue with the conversation with him with a straight face  ;D

The kids used to say the same about granny and make jokes but erm I am getting to that age myself now and guilty as charged  ;D ;D ;D



Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: Songbird on April 24, 2024, 08:53:47 PM
Love it fiftyplus  :rofl:
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: jaypo on April 25, 2024, 07:44:34 AM
Omg it makes it all the worse if you're farting and don't even know 🙀🙀🙀 think I'd better start saving my wine bottle corks 🚶‍♀️💨💨💨
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: Songbird on April 25, 2024, 08:45:17 AM
🤣🤣
What a great recycling idea for wine corks, Jaypo 👌. 'Course, I won't need to do that given that I simply don't have a wind problem - aye right!!  :rofl:
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: CLKD on April 25, 2024, 07:51:21 PM
Make sure that the corks are made of cork and not plastic ;-)
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: jaypo on April 25, 2024, 08:16:43 PM
Of course they're real cork clkd,I'm not common you know ......plastic indeed  ;D ;D
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: CLKD on April 25, 2024, 08:18:46 PM
 :rofl:
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: nickysmith19 on April 30, 2024, 10:37:41 AM
Many years ago when I stayed at my parents, one of the neighbours was in talking to my mum, we were sat on the sofa having our dinner, she was standing right in front of us and yes you have guessed ... she farted, well she didn't even stop talking, we all heard it and couldn't look at each other   ;D

I remember in a previous job when I worked on reception, the disabled toilet was right next to my desk and I could hear everyone and I don't think they realised ... the Managing Director used to regularly use this toilet for a pee & farts but the thing was he would then come out and start chatting to me (he obviously didn't realise I could hear everything) and I had to then continue with the conversation with him with a straight face  ;D

The kids used to say the same about granny and make jokes but erm I am getting to that age myself now and guilty as charged  ;D ;D ;D

Sounds like you've mastered the post fart poker face !!   :rofl:
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: ElkWarning on April 30, 2024, 10:54:03 AM
I'm a teacher and my chair at work (so in my classroom) makes a farting noise when I sit down on it. This used to make the kids giggle, and every time I'd say 'It's the chair, alright, it's the chair'.

We then progressed to everyone exclaiming 'It's the chair' whenever there was any farty noise ... And then a couple of them made me a lovely sign saying, you guessed it, it's the chair.
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: CLKD on April 30, 2024, 10:56:31 AM
 ;D. My Mum was a sport teacher the 1950s and she would tell me that there were farts as the 11 year old girls did their exercises  :-\

Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: jaypo on April 30, 2024, 12:52:54 PM
Have you ever seen Billy Connollys skit about doing yoga and farting,hilarious  ;D
Title: Re: The transition is now complete
Post by: CLKD on April 30, 2024, 01:00:52 PM
That reminds me of the 'JJobby Wicker' sketch  :lol: