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[debbyx]

Morning.

I have been posting a lot recently as suffering so bad with Anxiety and panic.

 I have noticed that I am finding it difficult to have a bath or shower ,  I used to love my nightly baths with loads of bubbles but now I am so anxious at bath time. Some nights I run the bath and can’t even get in it , i end up just having a wash.  If I do manage to get into the bath it’s for a bout 2 minutes and then I totally panic. My legs are weak and my heart pounding and I think I will faint.  Washing my hair is also a nightmare,   I have also noticed that now the weather is colder I have put the heating on low in the morning but instead of waking up and having a cosy house , I panic as it’s to warm and open all the windows as I feel like I can’t breathe

Why is this happening now. I get so angry with myself ,  is this another part of menopause / hormones.

I wish I could be me again and not a constant crying nervous wreck day in and day out. 

I have just had a lot of bloods and and full medical done and all came back normal apart from a B 12 Deficiency which I have got tablets for , the GP actually said for a woman of my age (63) my test results were really good and I was very healthy,   So why do I feel so rubbish.

[CLKD]

Hormones.  When I was severely depressed with acute anxiety in the 1990s I was unable to stay in the bath for more than a couple of minutes; I HAD to get out: couldn't concentrate on TV programmes or read magazines.  Usually I laze in the bubbles for about 40 mins with cuppa and very good book.

This too will pass. Don't beat yourself up, if U could alter the situation u would be doing so. 

It's the Change, so we don't get back to where we were but naturally move on sometimes with symptoms that seem will never end.

I wash my hair over the bath into bowls, I have one to wet my hair/scalp B4 shampooing - then I rinse from the two one with cooler water than the other.  It's the loss of control that caused my symtpms then. 

All your investigations are within normal limits and you've been given tablets for the B12 which may take a while to kick in. 

[Aubrey]

Yes! One of my peri- symptoms was irrational fear of things I'd always enjoyed. I became terrified of swimming in the sea, hills that looked too steep (really), I couldn't ride a motorbike anymore, and night panic was happening for the first time. It's not uncommon. Get your HRT right and it'll pass. Mine did.

[dangermouse]

Could be from over-heating when your blood vessels are too dilated from oestrogen spikes. It’s a very disconcerting feeling which also causes tachycardia. None of it is necessarily anxiety related - although the fear of it happening can create a layer of that on top - so more from adrenaline triggering cortisol to be released.

You could try making the bath cooler to reverse the dilation.

[Wrensong]

Agree with dangermouse - anything that causes overheating during & beyond the menopause transition can result in uncomfortably increased heart rate, feelings of anxiety, panic/overwhelm & the compulsion to escape the situation. 

I found early in peri that I had to stop taking hot baths for that reason & 20 years on I still feel unwell if I try.  I'm the same age as you & on HRT.  I shower twice daily instead of bathing & don't have any problems with that.  Suggest you give hot baths a miss for a while & just have tepid/warm showers.  You can easily stand aside from the flow of water if you start to feel panicked & reduce the water temperature.  For some years I ended every shower by gradually decreasing the water temp so that by the end of the shower the hot tap was turned right off  & I was nice & cool so that the heat from blow drying my hair afterwards wasn't an additional problem.

Frustratingly I also had to stop taking holidays in the Med because I could no longer tolerate the heat.

Try not to beat yourself up for it debbyx.  None of what happens to us at menopause is our fault. 
W x

[debbyx]

Thank you. 

Just feel like I am going mad and totally loosing it at the moment.  Makes me feel a little better to know others have experienced the same thing even though it isn’t nice for any of us. 

[CLKD]

Not mad at all.  !!

[DottyD68]

Hi Debbyx,

Sorry to hear you are feeling so rubbish but I can relate to what you are experiencing.

I am very outdoorsy but for me, since perimenopause,  when I have seen a weather forecast of full sunshine (without clouds) and extremely high temperatures, rather than feel overjoyed like everyone else, I have felt utter panic. The prospect of overheating is overwhelming and has affected me doing what I used to enjoy. Sometimes when we have driven down south on a hot, cloudless sky (in a car with a/c) I have been so stressed as I can't escape the direct sunlight. Total madness. However I do think this has been improving lately so there is hope that it is a temporary thing.

I am so glad you posted this.

Aubrey, I am so glad to have read your post about fear of steep hills. As a walker and cyclist, my fear of steep hills became totally irrational. I am not totally "cured" yet but again things seem to be improving and I force myself to take them on and once I have done successfully it is helping me to get over it. My poor husband can't understand it because it had never been a problem before and I suddenly started forensically analysing all the proposed routes he has plotted and freaking out at steep gradients. So it's not just me. Thank you.

Take care ladies. It will pass X