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[kpatton56]

Hurdity your knowledge and help are greatly appreciated. 

[Justjules]

Hurdity,

Please accept my sincere apologies and any other ladies I may have offended.  It's not my usual nature to be confrontational but for some reason took umbridge at you telling a member to remove something which she had posted a link to and being the written word, took it the wrong way, which in hindsight and reading it back, I realise it was wrong of me.  The other member had left because she said she was sick and tired of people mentioning Professor Studd and then didn't like being told not to read the posts so that didn't seem right either.  All in all, no excuses, but a bad day and I'm really sorry.  I hope you will forgive me?

[Elizabethrose]

Justjules, you raised a very valid point yesterday so don't feel badly today. I have seen a number of very sarcastic, patronising comments on this site. Some people ride roughshod over others beliefs and can do so in a bullying, domineering manner. We all of us have to make difficult choices about how to manage our health at this stage in our lives, some of the decisions are taken out of our hands.

Whether we take the HRT, other medicinal or indeed also 'natural' routes, is a right of the individual and they shouldn't be mocked or pilloried for doing so. Indeed, when discussions of a political nature have arisen on this site; patronising, sarcastic, bullying remarks can also abound.

I do understand, that in any collective situation, there will always be some who will take it upon themselves to manage everyone, to unofficially police what others say and do. However, this is a wonderful site enabling a very wide range of women to help, encourage and support each other and also to offer advice according to their own experiences. Of course we need to avoid unscrupulous advertising taking place which doesn't benefit any of us and can be detrimental.

There has also been criticism on another thread about some women seemingly advertising Professor Studd. Subsequently, it would seem some members have been advised by Emma to stop discussing Professor Studd and his recommended treatment methods, this is following complaints being made directly to her by some members. Might I suggest, that these women aren't advertising but just rejoicing in finding a solution to their extreme health conditions. It is very easy to become evangelical about something that has revolutionised our lives, we can easily become over enthusiastic. The other thing to consider here too, is that by those fortunate enough to be able to access private health care, sharing the detail of treatment plans, the information is then open to everyone. Especially, as so many have discovered, GPs can be uninformed about treatment possibilities. I do agree however, that private health care shouldn't be necessary but it's a cold fact of life that it sometimes is and I can speak from experience here. However, none of us should be insisting others have to see an expensive London based specialist otherwise no help is available to them. That is quite simply wrong.

The rather longwinded point I'm trying to make here, is that this site is an excellent vehicle for women to gain support and advice, enabling us to better our experiences at this very very difficult stage of our lives. Can we not offer this support in a kindly supportive manner?

[Taz2]

I think we all need one of these 

Taz x

[Maryjane]

Totally agree and put far better than me , Elizabeth Rose.

It's a great shame we can't mention the private sector lot , wether London or not as the one I will be seeing not Studd , has a research team working with him  and I could have passed on what suggested for me when I see him in November.

This is great site with such knowledgeable ladies , and the whole idea of a problem is to " share" information, regardless of where we got the info from surely ?

It's like any group of women , wether real life or virtual there is always a chance of a " ruck".

My hubby had to live with three teenage girls and me 😳😳

....and as meno is us going in reverse , perhaps we are going through the teenage stage 🤔

[dangermouse]

I think the link to sales sites issue is the most important point, not because we aren't allowed to mention practitioners, products and books, but to stop people joining purely to market their business.

Maybe we could have a separate Reviews forum area for our experience of anything that's paid for, so private doctors, books, supportive products etc. (still without links). Then on the main forums we can advise those, for example, having NHS GP/referral issues, simply to look into private doctors and they can then explore this themselves via the Reviews section, where we can go to town about our positive or negative experiences.

Also stops the need for having to keep repeating indepth information to new people who come along, which can then appear as biased because some people just post more than others, which we certainly don't want to discourage!

[Elizabethrose]

Seems like food for thought Dangermouse, you make some valuable points.

If Emma is being forced to gag women with valuable private health information, then it would make sense that this info can still be tapped into. I have been lucky as I have a number of medic pals who have pointed me in the right direction over the years, not everyone is so fortunate. Obviously there is the specialist link at the top of the page but that doesn't necessarily provide us with the detail we need. Nick Panay for example is listed as having his practice in Harley Street but doesn't link to the fact that he is also available on the NHS at London Hospitals. Some women would then immediately rule him out as being inaccessible to them and of course he still could be to women living too far outside the London area.

It would be a tragedy if we lost access to treatment strategies that could benefit us all. Of course as we know, one size doesn't fit all with HRT, but the more knowledge the better.

[Taz2]

I've been reading this thread with interest. How do we know that Emma is "being forced to gag women" on the subject of private health information? We have always been allowed to post in the past as long as we were respectful to other members but the guidelines of the forum are that we can't post a direct link to a site which has a "buy now" or price list facility. I just wondered when it changed and how we know it has?

Taz x 

[Elizabethrose]

Freckles posted this comment on a post last night Taz;

That's great news Blue Kingfisher! Hope you continue to feel better!
I've been officially "advised" by MM NOT to mention my experience of  Studd's clinic or his treatment regime in my posts as it apparently constitutes "advertising" and some members of MM have apparently been so distressed by this, they have complained.
So, of course, I won't in future, as I don't want to offend anyone.
As always, other treatment options, other a private consultation  are always available
But I am genuinely pleased you had a positive  outcome from your consultation. 
Hopefully things will continue improve for you.
Enjoy your holiday- Skiathos is lovely!

[Mary G]

Elizabethrose, I think that is a very fair assessment.  People should be able to speak freely about their experiences and I can't see anything wrong with sharing a life changing experience, which is precisely what I had.  A more positive way forward would be for more practitioners to follow Professor Studd's successful regime.  The reason people bang on about him is because his regime works extremely well (for most but admittedly not all) and changes their lives, small matter of. 

You have to be realistic, people are always going to have disagreements on forums, it goes with the territory and we are not necessarily going to be singing from the same hymn sheet. That is life.

As for forum conduct, in my other life, I am a football fan and nearly always the only woman on the forum slogging it out with a crowd of blokes and the culture is completely different.  The language is pretty fruity, there is plenty of verbal and believe me, this is unbelievably civilised in comparison!

[Emma]

wuzn't me missus, honest..!
Just to be clear, it wasn't a reprimand from a forum admin.

Emma

[Elizabethrose]

Hahaha!

Well if that's the case I'm pleased that the forum can still be used as a vehicle to exchange valuable information. As I've mentioned before, let's try to do it in a kindly sensitive way!

[Clovie]

So am I, pleased.
I find the info on here - from everyone - a lifeline (at times) in a sea of turmoil! 

I may not always agree with someone's outlook or regime or whatever but I acknowledge their right to discuss it and if it's not for me, I just disregard! 

As for ladies being offended or being uneasy to post about going private, there will always be someone - and I quote 1980s Harry Enfield's (Birmingham accent) character  "considerably richer than YAW" 
There will always be those that have and those that have not, unfortunately.

I was able to use info from on here to approach my GP ask for a referral to a NHS Menopause clinic and again there, I went on to suggest my own regime. Happily it was agreed and I gained great quality of life! 

Thankyou Menopause Matters - and ALL members for your valuable collective input! 

[Ju Ju]

 

I too am grateful for the support I have received here which has helped me seek and gain a better quality of life.

[linz57]

I happen to find reading other women's experiences really interesting, even if they do not apply to me.
The information I have found on this forum has enabled me to feel more confident about asking the medical profession  for what I would like and some items such as Oestrogel I had never heard of before. Ok, my doc wouldn't listen to my suggestions , but that's hopefully going to be sorted soon.....
Without hearing of others trial and error I wouldn't have known where to start. Thank you all😃