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Author Topic: Newbie with tearful Menopause  (Read 4552 times)

MrsLordLanky

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Newbie with tearful Menopause
« on: November 26, 2015, 04:11:27 PM »

Hello,

I recently saw a menopause specialist. In the letter she sent to my GP afterwards, she started it with 'I saw this very pleasant but rather unfortunate young 35 year old'. That just about summed it up for me.

Let me share a bit about me. I am 35, married to a lovely husband and I have a 3 year old daughter. When I was 15, I had a large ovarian cyst which required surgery. I was put on the pill afterwards to control my periods and cysts. Eventually I was taken off the pill when I was 22 (the doctor had tried to take me off the pill previously, but I grew more cysts). During the next few months, I had permanent stomach pain, especially low on my left hand side. It would wake me at night. I also started to have allergic reactions to food. One night, when I was at home with my parents, I had a glass of wine and went into anaphylactic shock. I saw a number of doctors and consultants following this. I saw a dietician, who put me on a no sugar, no yeast diet. I was diagnosed with asthma. I had allergy tests. Out of 40 allergens I was tested for, I was allergic to 27 including some nuts, wheat, lactose, shell fish and alcohol. I basically live on rice, potato, meat, fish, some vegetables and fruit. I have various other intolerances too, mainly due to IBS. I cook everything at home from scratch. People wonder how I manage. I have done now for over 10 years. It is not easy sometimes, especially when I go out with friends for a meal who point out everything I can't have  :(

When I was pregnant, I felt in the best health I had been for years. I had to have an emergency c-section (my baby was breech) which no-one wanted to carry out because my allergies (I had a complete anesthetic plan in place as my allergies include some medication, latex and sweetners which can be found in medicines) Within 5 days of having my beautiful daughter, I was back in hospital. I had breast feeding anaphylaxis (yes, I really was allergic to my own breast milk). The staff had to google it to diagnose it as there are so few reported cases. It was a very stressful and emotional time. I had to stop breast feeding or end up in intensive care or worse. I also could not go near my daughter for a few days, as everytime she cried, I started to go into shock  :(

Within the first year of her life, I had awful night sweats and mood swings. I saw my gp (he is fantastic) who sent me for blood tests. My hormone levels were consistent with menopause. I saw a specialist who confirmed I was in perimenopause the day after my 34th birthday. I was started on a low dose of HRT (Femostan). For the first few months, I felt amazing. I could cope again.

In August this year, both myself and my husband were made redundant from the same company. He now has a job in London, leaving the house at 7am and getting home at 8pm. I have taken a job as a carer (which I love), working some evenings and Saturday morning, so I can care for our daughter. Financially, we are worse off so this has been a worry. After Christmas though, my daughter will be at nursery more as she will have funded hours. I am applying for a part time job so I can earn additional money whilst she is at nursery.

Since being made redundant and being at home all day, I am struggling. My HRT is not controlling my menopause at all. Since August, the number of bleeds I am having a month has increased from one to three. As soon as I finish one, a few days later, another one starts. I have horrendous night sweats, I am tearful all the time and mega moody  :'(

The menopause specialist has given me a higher dose of Femostan but I cannot start this until the end of the pack i'm on. She also prescribed Testosterone Gel because of my lack of energy and fatigue, but I cannot use this because it is 96% alcohol  :(

I am trying to go out with my daughter for more playdates and activities, but these are full of mums either pregnant or trying to get pregnant who ask when I am going to have another :(

I am trying to remain positive but it can be so hard  :'(
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Galadriel

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #1 on: November 26, 2015, 04:30:06 PM »

Welcome to the forum MrsLordLanky  :welcomemm: You need a :hug: too.

I doubt I have any useful advice for you but this is a great forum for sharing experiences. I found it helped to know that I wasn't alone with all these weird and scary symptoms.

Considering how young you are, it's vitally important to take HRT to protect your bones and heart, as well as treating the other symptoms. It can take a bit of trial and error before you find the one that suits you the best.

Have a good search around the green menus at the top of the screen - there's lots of useful information in there.

Galadriel x

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Milamam

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #2 on: November 27, 2015, 05:59:26 PM »

Welcome from me too, MrsLordLanky
You do have a lot on your platter!! I cannot even imagine how you cope with so many allergies!
It is good though that you have started HRT to try alleviate your menopausal symptoms. I am also on mid-dose Femoston for already a year and a half . I am 44. These past few months I also experienced frequent bleeding, every 12-13 days. My dictor first made sure there is nothing abnormal i.e cysts or fibrosis that may cause this. He then suggested that the current HRT might be insufficient especially the progesterone, so he added 10mg of dydrogesterone to take day 11-28 alonside the femoston. Since you are at a lower dose, my first thought will be that you might need a bit more to get your cycles in order. What about your other symptoms? Have they reoccurred? You are too young and perhaps a higher dose will be better. Worth discussing with your doc.

Good luck!
Milamam
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CLKD

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #3 on: November 27, 2015, 08:27:51 PM »

 :welcomemm:  from me too. 

Firstly, I would ditch the 'friends' ………. anyone who doesn't understand my eating habits (recovering anorexic) got dropped from my C.mas card list  ;).  The last time I went out with friends I didn't join in with eating but not one made any comments, we were too busy chatting  ::).  I can understand someone making a comment the first time around but ever after, keep Big Gob Shut in fact, that is what I would tell them  :D.

Same with anyone who asks when the next baby will come along.  It's common in our society sadly, in fact there's been a lot of articles in the Telegraph about it in recent weeks  :'(.  I would reply "Who is asking?" or "Why do you need to know?" …..

Were you aware that redundancy was on the cards and did you get good settlements?  That will give you a backing until at least after the Festive season!  R U going into the care sector full-time? 

Have a chat with a Pharmacist about the the Testosterone Gel - how inconsiderate of the 'specialist' to prescribe it if she is aware of your allergies  :bang:
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Dorothy

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #4 on: November 27, 2015, 09:37:44 PM »

Hello & welcome to the forum.  Hope you find it really helpful - there is a lot of useful stuff here and loads of ladies with a lot of knowledge too.

I agree with CLKD - tell your friends once that you find them commenting on what you can't eat makes things difficult for you (people don't always realise they are causing upset) and if they keep doing it, stop eating out with them - same with people who ask intrusive questions about children.  Or, when someone says 'when are you going to have another child?' reply with 'when are you going to learn to mind your own business?'!!!   :) 

There is a charity called the Daisy Network which is especially for women with early/premature menopause - might be worth looking at that to see if you would find it helpful.  Otherwise, there are a few early meno ladies on here - I'm 40, started symptoms at 35.

Re HRT, depending on how far along you are with peri, it might be worth looking at a birth control pill.  That's what I'm on - my GP recommends it for younger women and I've found it's really helpful although I do have a couple of days down time when I have my break, so currently running packs together and adjusting the timing of my break so it falls on days when I can take things easier.  E.g. yesterday and today I should have been on my break and feeling rough, but because these were going to be two manic days, I'm carrying on with the pill until a quieter time.

I hope you are able to find something to help soon and things get a bit easier for you.



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MrsLordLanky

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #5 on: November 27, 2015, 09:49:57 PM »

Thank you so much everyone - you have made me feel not so alone  :)

I am so up and down. I feel ok for a while then I hit rock bottom again. I feel like my body is ageing so quick - my skin is dry, I am so tired, my boobs hurt :'( When I washed my hair earlier, lots came out :( I am taking vitamin D, Starflower Oil and Oil of Evening Primrose (along with my other meds for IBS, allergies, asthma etc) to try and help. I know I need to be on HRT and because of my age, I have been told I need to be on one where I have a monthly bleed  :'(

Hi Galadriel - Thank you for your welcome and kind words :) I will spend some time exploring the site over the next few days.

Hi Milamam - Thank you for your welcome :) What you had to say was really interesting. I was on Femoston for about a year and a half too when the frequency of my bleeds increased. I have been prescribed a higher dose of Femoston which I can start next Thursday after I have finished my current pack. I am desparately hoping it helps as I seem to be bleeding pretty much all the time :'(

Hi CLKD - Thank you too for your welcome :) I was borderline anorexic as a teenager so I get where you are coming from. I do not eat out now with these particular 'friends' - I stick to ones who are supportive and know what a struggle it is for me to find anything to eat when we go out. I am in a good mind to tell the next person who asks me when am I having another baby that my vagina is purely for pleasure now  ;)

Redundancy happened really quick - we were TUPE to another company which was to far away to work without relocating so redundancy immediately followed. We are ok at the moment. Yesterday I applied for a second job so hopefully I will hear back soon. If I get it, I will be working as a carer in the evenings and an adult carer support worker part time in the week.

I am seeing my GP in the next couple of weeks - I am going to discuss testosterone with him. He is very good and I know he will try and find an alternative.

Hi Dorothy - Thank you for your welcome :) As I mentioned above to CLKD, I have stopped eating out with these 'friends'. I have heard of the Daisy Network - I will definitely look into it. My GP/Specialists are reluctant to put me back on the Pill. When I was on it in my teens after my ovarian cyst, my cervix broke down really badly, causing pain and bleeding. I like the idea of being able to adjust the timing of the break though. I will ask my GP again when I see him.

One of the major problems I have is that my allergies and asthma are all hormone related, so whenever my medication is altered, it plays havoc with everything else  :'(

Thank you so much again   :hug:
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CLKD

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #6 on: November 27, 2015, 10:49:54 PM »

Have you had skin testing etc. recently?   I know that sometimes people can react to the medication coverings rather than the active ingredient itself, for some drugs there are liquid alternatives ………

Some allergies can be gotten rid of by gradually introducing them to a person under controlled conditions in very small amounts, i.e. cat dander for those who get asthmatic ……… this is fairly new technology but might be worth while you considering. 

Nuts, wheat, certain pollens are quite common in our 'modern' age  ::).  For me it's dust mite pooh …… so when DH wields the hoovery-thingy regularly my symptoms go away.  For years I was bothered by itchy roof of mouth, back of throat, under the bottom lip on the chin, deep inside my ears ……..  latex is a recent allergen but there are different products for 'rubber' gloves.

If you are bleeding a lot then make sure that you aren't oh, word has gone  >:( - lack of iron …………. do let us know how you get on!
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MrsLordLanky

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #7 on: November 28, 2015, 11:09:42 PM »

I haven't had recent skin **** testing. I am still under my allergy consultant who is also the chest consultant who looks after my asthma. It is quite good he deals with both - it's one less person in the loop! He has classed me as a 'complex case' - because my hormones are so linked to my asthma and allergies. He is very reluctant to do any more tests until my menopause is controlled  ::)

I'm allergic to dust mites too - it's not much fun is it :( The latex problem I can usually get round - I use non-latex gloves for work. Problem is in hospitals, there are so many hazards for me. Alcohol gel, alcohol wipes, latex used in various things from gloves to blood pressure cuffs.

Anaemic is the word ;) I am already on iron tablets, but I think I will ask my GP for another blood test, because I am loosing so much blood. I am seeing him next week. I will let you know what happens x
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Kathleen

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #8 on: November 29, 2015, 01:01:33 PM »

Hello  MrsLordyLanky and welcome to the forum.

My, you have been through the mill and I admire your resilience!

I wonder if any of your consultants have mentioned including probiotics or fermented foods to your diet as a way of treating your IBS and allergies?  This may be tricky but a bit of a Google could turn up some research that is helpful to you.

I hope you get all the treatment you need and do please keep us updated with your progress.

Take care.

K.
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CLKD

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #9 on: November 29, 2015, 03:24:31 PM »

That's the 1 - anaemic  ::)

For many years I found that when my period was due I would get bloated with excess fluids and it would cause asthma-like wheeziness.  Not enough to complain to the GP because I would forget each month: until the next PMT  ::)

Think about the types of bedding/clothing/towels; how often you launder your towels/flannels/kitchen clothes; certainly since Himself began wielding the hoover more often (4 years ago) my symptoms have improved.  Once a week is enough unless symptoms are troublesome, then we strip the bed and he does the mattress, under and over the bed, cupboards etc..  Tiresome but does improve symptoms.  We have a bag-less machine so the dust goes into the council bin.  No bags for mites to hide in. 

Cotton everything? or as much as possible.  Boil wash?  New slippers as those you wear might be holding mites/poo - I believe it's the time of year to ask for 'stuff'  :D.  Get jackets cleaned professionally, especially those that haven't been worn often.  Woolly jumpers on the appropriate cycle and then hung on the line to blow - 2-day would be suitable  ::).  Mats - and anywhere else where mites might hide. 

Carpets?  Hire a steam cleaner?  Hard work, cheaper than the gym  ;D
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MrsLordLanky

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #10 on: December 03, 2015, 04:20:00 PM »

Hi Everyone -

Today I start my higher dose HRT - Yay!  :ola: I am asking alot of it, so fingers crossed!

Thanks K for your post. I was on probiotics for years - they didn't do much. The doctors put my stomach pain down to sugar and yeast fermenting together, hence why they cut them both out. I will do some further research into fermenting foods though - thank you. I am seeing my GP in a weeks time.

Thanks CLKD - everything is washed once a week. We have a bagless hoover too, hoovering everywhere a couple of times a week seems to help. We have wood floors, so we steam clean them. It's just staying on top of things  ;)

Take care everyone  :)
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CLKD

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Re: Newbie with tearful Menopause
« Reply #11 on: December 03, 2015, 04:28:53 PM »

Staying on top - ain't it just  ::)
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