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Author Topic: Obsessing about things  (Read 11752 times)

jedigirl

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #30 on: October 04, 2015, 11:59:11 AM »

Peterspots
Thank you for the link, it looks like a useful site. I will look at it with my daughter later xx
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CLKD

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #31 on: October 04, 2015, 12:44:13 PM »

Is DD aware of your hormonal fluctuations?  It might make her open up if she knows that you, too are having problems.  I know I thought my parents never had problems  ::) i.e. hormones, hot flushes, crashing fatigue - I knew they were angry at each other [I know why now] - but Dad would shut himself away to avoid flak and Mum gave the impression that children should be seen but not heard  ::)

Maybe share?
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jedigirl

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #32 on: October 04, 2015, 03:41:39 PM »

She does know about my problems. Last year I was really quite ill with it all and lost alot of weight. I was talking to her today and she said she realised I was struggling with it again. She's actually very empathetic, she feels things a little too deeply, like her Mother sadly! In fact she understands more than my hubby at times as she just started her periods this year and had felt pretty awful with it at times.
PS what is DD?! i guess it's something to do with daughter! 
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CLKD

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #33 on: October 04, 2015, 03:45:15 PM »

Dear Daughter  ;)

DH - Dear Husband
OH - other half
DS - Dear Son etc. etc. etc…………  of course sometimes one needs to not include the 'dear' bit  ::)
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jedigirl

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #34 on: October 04, 2015, 03:49:58 PM »

Ah Thanks CLKD, is their a secret code somewhere or am I just not very quick on the uptake?!
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CLKD

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #35 on: October 04, 2015, 03:51:11 PM »

Secret Code - you have to have been here a while  ;D

TMI - is too much information - but that never applies here  ;)
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Peterspots

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #36 on: October 04, 2015, 03:56:31 PM »

I have to say I have faced many things but my DD self harming literally broke my heart. My body has fallen apart this year. A coincidence. I have never felt something so deeply. As with all things she will recover & time helps. It has helped us discuss things but I wouldn't wish it on anyone. It is very common & I wish I had recognised the signs. I love her with all my heart but the bullying runs deep. I wish your daughter well. Our children our lucky to have people who love them to help them through dark times & to let them know to never feel ashamed x
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CLKD

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #37 on: October 04, 2015, 03:59:07 PM »

Why do you think you should have 'read the signs'.  We have ways of coping that we don't share so teens tend to self harm without anyone knowing.  Don't beat yourself up!  This is her choice during a difficult time - though I have never understood how cutting can ease tension.  I do understand how throwing things or giving a door a Very Good Kick helps though  ::) ……..

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jedigirl

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #38 on: October 04, 2015, 09:05:35 PM »

Peter spots, sending a big hug. It's certainly a terrifying thing to experience. I feel sick look at the red lines across her beautiful skin. She never feels she is good enough, despite having family and friends who adore her, being a talented gymnast (double British champion) and loves animals so much she wants to work with them. Sadly her school seems to have given her the impression that unless she gets a load of A* in her GCSEs she won't achieve much. That's going to take alot of undoing and am wishing the year away till she can leave. Good luck to you and yr daughter xxx
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CLKD

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #39 on: October 04, 2015, 09:08:27 PM »

Could your daughter go and work somewhere animal related at weekends, i.e. have a chat with the local Vet Surgery, Pet Shop, farm food suppliers to get an idea as to what openings there may be?  Even in 1969 when I wrote to the Zoos asking what I would need to become a Keeper it would have been 'A' Levels  :'( ……..

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jedigirl

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #40 on: October 04, 2015, 09:43:32 PM »

She's looking into a course at a nearby college in animal care diploma, fab college with small animal unit and farm. She's also fostering two hedgehogs from a rescue centre. All the places I have contacted said she was too young at 15.
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CLKD

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #41 on: October 04, 2015, 09:46:04 PM »

She's headed in the 'right' direction. 
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CLKD

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #42 on: October 05, 2015, 03:59:52 PM »

I agree.  Tony Blair put his oar in when he suggested every one should go to Uni., what parents didn't realise was that it was to keep un-employment figures low!  :bang:  It should be pointed out to your Young People that they can get suitable qualifications at any time, i.e. as Mature Students or via the OU!

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Dandelion

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #43 on: October 05, 2015, 05:20:07 PM »

Dandelion, so good to hear you're feeling better on the right regime now, what a battle you've had.

Your post made a lot of sense too, thank you.  I totally agree with doing something you enjoy if you can. That's great you finally had the chance to develop your artistic talent.

S x
Thanks Sparkle, there was a time when I thought I was going to give up on the hrt, as I thought, maybe it doesn't work for all women, but I am glad I perservered. I wouldn't be without my patches now, although the doctor wants me off them eventually,  I don't see why I should have to be off them.
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jedigirl

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Re: Obsessing about things
« Reply #44 on: October 05, 2015, 06:38:08 PM »

Thank you all
I have contacted the Special Needs Co Ordinator at her school to see if she can offer anything. Also got some Kalms on advice of pharmacist and Rescue Remedy pastilles to keep in her blazer. I want to help my girl as much as I can , even if it just gets her to her CAMHS appointments, just wish I felt stronger myself but DH(get me CLKD!) is amazingly strong in all this. I always thought i was the solid one but not now.
Incidentally went to GPs myself today and changed back to Oestrogel from Sandrena, am convinced the Sandrena isn't absorbing. My pyjamas were sticking to the gel hours after I applied it  :-\ Am hoping that helps with the anxiety too.
Hugs JG
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